Death's Daughter
by GoodByexx
Summary: Discontinued due to lack of time.
1. Preface

**Disclaimer:**** I do not own the Twilight saga. The plot of this story, as far as I know, is original though, and if it's not: sorry.**

Death's Daughter

**Preface:**

I looked across the cold floor of the warehouse, which was currently coated in blood. _So this is what they mean by massacre_, I thought, sickened. I may deal with death daily, but this was different: it was…horrifying - though not even that was an adequate word. I knew that this image would never leave me, that it would always haunt me. The corpses were splayed around the room, their eyes frozen open in terror, mouths poised to scream. Their screams and cries for help were brutally silenced. The blood splashed on the walls, over the bodies, people lying in pools of blood. The ruby splashed around would have been almost artistic, if it hadn't been so grotesque.

I snapped out of whatever reverie I was in, as one word flashed through my stunned mind: _Edward. Edward has been here, seen this._ Then another thought struck me. One that made my chilly skin practically freeze, one that made me shiver with dread. _What if he's still here?_ I assumed he had run when I told him to, but deep down, I knew better. He would stay and try to help any way he could - even if it cost him his life.

I started running frantically. "Edward!" I yelled, not caring if there were other monsters lurking in the shadows, ready to attack. The only thing that mattered was Edward.

"Edward! Where are you?" I called desperately, hoping for any sort of answer, any indication that he lived.

"Please," I whispered - prayed - to any entity that would listen. "Please let him live."

It was then that I saw the white shirt, his shirt, stained coral and fell to my knees next to him.

"Edward!" I wailed as I saw him lying still on the floor. His eyes were closed, and he looked almost angelic, despite the blood coating him. He looked dead.

Never in my life have I been so scared. After all I'm immortal: what have I to fear? Yet, in that moment, I felt a terror that I was sure would surpass any others.

"No! Edward," I pleaded desperately, "come on. You have to wake up. You can't leave me. You made me like you. You made me love you." As I finished my sentence, my voice was angry, it quickly changed.

"Please, don't leave me," I begged, much like how a small, timid child would beg their parent as they leave them at some new and scary function.

I held Edward to me, praying for him to live, to open his eyes. Something. Anything. I couldn't bring myself to regret the decision of going to the tiny town of Forks, Washington, no matter how much pain I was currently in. The good far surpassed the bad. Edward did. If we're never sad, we never know when we're happy. I was never sad before. I never truly lived, and even though I was sad -actually, my heart felt like it was currently breaking into millions of tiny shards that could never be put together again - Edward was worth it. Even if it saved me all this heartache, even if it saved Edward's life, I couldn't seem to regret meeting him, loving him. As selfish as it was, even if Edward was currently lying dead in my arms, I couldn't even force myself to regret a thing.

"Open your eyes!" I urged desperately.

Was Edward really about to leave me?

**A/N**Okay, so that's the preface, do you like it? Review and let me know please. An explanation will be in the next chapter, explaining a little more about the summary, we also meet Bella! So stick with me, I'm going somewhere with this. XD The next chapter will be posted fairly soon, whether or not anyone wants me to post it, but at least try and look at the next chapter before you cut this story loose totally. No letters in this story, so it's a big step for me. XD Speaking of letters, I haven't forgotten them, but Rosalie is not being cooperative at the moment.

Thanks you to Blood filled tears (who writes excellent stories) and who helped and gave me advice with the first draft of this idea, before it became this, and _**of course **_to Marie/Spunkymonkey for doing an awesome job editing and for letting me whine and generally all-round pester her. I am convinced you have the patience of a saint. And finally (I know, hurry up and finish the oscar speech already) thank you to everyone who read this, regardless of whether you liked it or not, and a SUPER thanks to everyone who read it then reviewed!


	2. Direct NOT collect

**Disclaimer****: I do not own 'Twilight'. Just thought you should know...**

**Chapter One :**

Direct _not _collect!

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Light. Light reaches out in an effort to enclose around the hooded figure standing just out of reach of the dazzling white light. She is standing. We know it's a she, for her posture and her typical hourglass shape is distinctly feminine. She is stands alone, still condemning herself to the dark, to the shadows that haunt the night. The dark has no beginning and no end, just black. The light stretches wider, further, seemingly in an effort to reach the pale, porcelain skin of her ethereal beauty - not that she would agree - standing _just_ out of reach, _almost_ in the soothing caress of the light, but not. The light _nearly _arriving upon her pale face, wishing to colour the white and mar it's perfection.

It became obvious that she had pale skin when she pulled down the black hooded robe she was wearing. We can see her lips, which are cut like rubies; soft and blood red. We can see her shaped nose and the fairly prominent cheekbones that match the perfect face. Perfect because she is so imperfect, her imperfections make her real, make her _her_.

Then her hair comes tumbling free and chestnut locks cascade down her back, blending in with the darkness. They seem to never to end though they do; her silky, soft, shiny hair ends at her waist.

Then as she looks up, we see her eyes. Her mysterious eyes, perhaps the gateway to her soul. Her eyes are strange and beautiful. Her ebony eyes. Where does her pupil end and the black begin? Perhaps just a very, very dark brown, though this creature is truly rare; a natural beauty who would easily rival Aphrodite's charm and allure, she can be charming - she just doesn't usually try. And those deep eyes, not scary, though not warm, just……there.

Gasps ring out among the light as those that stand there see this woman -girl? - and the darkness waiting for them. Some drop to their knees, thinking perhaps she is their ultimate judge, their God, or perhaps they merely think her worthy of their worship. For all idols are attractive, are they not? Her rich voice, slightly husky, naturally, chimes out among the crowd of people on their knees before her, some do stand, but they all gape at her.

"Stand!" One word. One command. Her tone does not accept rebellion, all must stand. Those who speak English scramble to their feet, not wanting to anger the goddess before them. Those who do not, those from other parts of the world, remain on their knees. She translates, and again orders them to stand. Again they do as she commands them, not daring to go against her word. Some nervously shift as the new wave of silence covers the space. The light has long since vanished, gone as they looked at their sun, the female before them.

"Be still!" she once again commands. Now she does not have to translate. All can understand and speak whichever language she chooses to address them in.

"Idiots" she murmurs under her breath. _Don__'__t they know they stand above hell, across from rebirth and below heaven_, she thinks sourly. Though, of course the human souls do not, or else she would not be needed; she knows this. She's just bored. She seems to be bored a lot lately. And lonely. Our creature is lonely, she doesn't even know how lonely she is.

The people are dead but she doesn't wish to explain this to them. Then again, this is her job. She must explain that they are dead, and lead them to hell - barely anyone goes to hell, just the really bad people that would sicken even the devil . Some get reincarnated. Some may go to heaven - again, not many go to heaven, they usually end up reborn. That is what she has to explain to the group of people before her. They are of all races, religions, ages, genders. She is the grim reaper. She does not collect souls, she directs souls. See the mistake? Thousands of people die every day. How could she get to them all?

Actually, she is Death's daughter. Renee. An odd name for death? Perhaps, but still she is named Renee. The entity who makes death happen, who keeps a meticulous record of those who must die, whose time it is to die. Death gets bored on occasion, too. However, Death's daughter is more restless and powerful, which is not the best combination. She has no father. She did have a human father. Death's love was mortal, which makes her daughter half-mortal. She cannot die; she is immortal. So how does death and a mortal man meet? Especially when Death does not travel into the human realm? Well, there was a _HUGE_screw up. Maybe a short history is in order.

Renee is very, very old, despite looking very young, and found love in a human. A dead one. A 'Charles Swan' died on the sixth of October 1505. His mother died of Spanish influenza. He nursed her and held her hand as she died, slipping into the light. Poor Charles was taken into the light, too. This does not happen often and was not meant to either, for Renee would have known it, but these things do happen.

Renee tended to a shocked Charles herself, mad that such a mistake had been made to such a nice, caring, handsome man. She couldn't send him home and didn't know what else to do with him (it seemed such a waste to send him on) so she led him back to her home. They fell in a deep love, and then many years later (1908) they fell back out of love. Charles decided to move on, unknowingly leaving a pregnant Renee.

How can death give life? Who knows. Some things just…happen. Call it what you will: a curse or a miracle. It does not change the tale of how Isabella - Bella - came to be born.

**A/N ** To begin with I want to say that I do not mean to offend anyone's idea of the afterlife, this story is fiction and therefore is based slightly on my own beliefs. You can pretty much substitute any form of afterlife you want in this story, as I can't see it being a HUGE part in this story.

**Thank you **once again to Marie for letting me taking up her time sending stupid emails, whining, sending chapters and constantly changing whatever idea I come up with. It's also thanks to her this story has zero mistakes - except for the ones made by me.

Finally, not all of the story will be told like this, it will change to first person and probably alternate between Edward and Bella.They'll also be longer - all being well. If you have any questions or suggestions, then tell me. The song for this chapter is DOA by the Foo Fighters

P.S Thanks for reading and reviewing!


	3. How what is, Came to be

Disclaimer; I do not own Twilight, or it's characters.

Chapter 2: How what is, came to be. (Among other things)

I crept silently, like a lioness stalking her prey, poised, ready to fight. My eyes locked on my prey. I glided, ready to pounce gracefully.  
Instead of pouncing gracefully, I jumped - rather like a one-legged frog - and landed flat on my face, staring up at the frown of my mother. Damn, I cursed my human father for giving me his clumsy ways - I certainly didn't get my balance problems from my mother.

I know that at almost one-hundred years old, I shouldn't be afraid of my mother, but I am. I'm not really that afraid of my mother. I mean, she doesn't secretly beat me or anything, but I wanted to ask her a question. A pivitol one, yet I just couldn't.

I am such a wuss, I thought.

The truth is that I'm bored. All I do every day (or night- it's hard to tell with no sun) is tell people what door to take to the afterlife. It's boring. No, more than boring.  
It's mind numbing. So mind-numbingly boring, I would rather watch paint dry. There's only so many times you can read 'Pride and Prejudice' before you no longer have to read it, because you know all the words by heart. That's what I fill my spare time with: reading. It helps pass the hours of my lonely existence.

That's the other problem; I'm lonely. The only people I interact with are the dead. That CANNOT be healthy.

I digressed, sorry. So, I land in front of my mother after practically flying through the air like a demented...animal-thing. You get the idea!

"Bella, what are you doing?" asks my mother, kindly, yet concerned. I think she worries I have mental health problems.

"Nothing," I say as the dark guilt crawls over me again, coupled with its lover, shame.

"Bell's, what's wrong...You can talk to me. You know that, right?" she asks, her soft, hesitant tone of voice filling me with more shame.

"Yeah, I know. I'm fine, just..uh...nothing. I have to go...eat." And with that lame excuse, I swiftly made my exit.

I am such a wuss, I think again.

X&X&X&X&X&X&X&X& (time lapse)

"Bella."

Great, I think sarcastically, now she's worried about me.

I run to my mother's room, and hide - get this brilliant idea - under her bed. I was under pressure! My and I both have beds, even though we don't sleep. Why? They're extremely comfy, and the ones that move are extremly fun.

"Bells...? Bella, I saw you come in here!" I heard her move around the room a bit, looking for me before she stopped and sat on the bed.

"You know, this reminds me of when you were small. You would always run and hide when you were scared. Or upset. So, what's wrong sweetie?"

I crawled out from under the bed, with a frown glued to my face.

"It's nothing" I mumbled pathetically.

My mother - who is extremely strong although very petite - pulled me into a hug and murmered, "I'm not buying it. Tell me what's wrong."

"I'm just...I dunno..restless? I can't help but think that maybe...there's more...for me." I sighed and folded my arms, thinking about how stupid that just sounded.

"I'm sorry, honey. I should have noticed sooner. I've just been so busy, and there's a war on..." my mother trailed off. I got it, I really did, and I wasn't mad.  
She has to do what she has to do. I just sometimes wish she'd more of a mother, and less an ominous spirit, representing the unknown. It gets old after a while,  
especially when you feel like just lazing on the sofa with some ice-cream and a chick flick with your mom.

"It's okay Mom, I get it, I do. I shouldn't have brought this up. I just had one stupid errant thought!" After all, it was that desire that made me want to ask, that persuaded me to ask...then chickened out when it got tough. Personally, I blame the guilt.

"What thought?" I groaned and buried my head in my hands.

"Nothing"

"No, tell me"

"I was just thinking a change of scenery..maybe."

"Ah."

After a minute of my usually bubbly mother being solemnly silent, I raised my head in concern. She had a thoughtful look on her face. She also looked slightly pained.  
It was then I knew two things. First, she had figured me out completely. Second, I caused that look of pain, and I instantly felt regret for hurting my almost childlike mother.

"Just forget it Mom, it was a stupid thought and-"

She cut me off and said, "I think we'd better call Maria." And got up to get the phone.

Maria - like the nun from 'the sound of music', or the Blondie song - gets stuff for us. My books, our furniture, even our cable! She's part of a really old family, whose heritage dates back to sometime in the twelfth century. Every eldest female possesses 'the gift'.

Basically, they can cross over, but do not die, just get extremely freaked out. 'The gift' was discovered by my mother sometime in the thirteenth century and an aliance was formed. For money and the like, they helped my mother, and later us, out. I'm not sure if I've mentioned this, but my mother has a tendency to accidentally...kill things after being in the human world for a littlewhile. We have to watch that.

As a small child, I begged my mother endlessly to hear the story of how Maria's VERY great grandmother and she met. Elizabeth (the very great grandmother) fainted, and got the shock of her life when she ended up in a gloomy forest, and then Death's personal quarters because she was alive, yet in the Realm of Death. (I don't even pretend to understand it completely) After much concentration, Eliza managed to get herself home. It happened several more times, and she found my mother so helpful, they formed a frienship. They became the best of friends, my mother finally having a companion with a pulse and Eliza having someone to confide in and share humerous stories of how her four older brothers terrorized her - out of love, of course.

"Why are you calling Maria?" We only bother her at the end of each month with a list for her.

"To see about getting you set up."

"Set up? With what?"

"Well, we need to get you a home and enrolled in a school if you're going to Earth for a while."

Z&Z&Z&Z&Z&Z&Z&Z&Z&Z&Z&Z&Z&Z&Z (end)

AN I'm sorry this is so late, it was awful of me, but I kind of lost my way, and got really impatient wanting to 'get to the good stuff'. Sorry, I hope you all forgive me, if not, hopefully this chapter makes up for it. As always, thanks for reading and an even BIGGER thanks for reviewing.  
Also, Marie, you rock you awesome hobo you. 


	4. Meet Edward

Disclaimer: I for the 4th time, I do not own Twilight.  
This is for 'Crazy Twilight Lover' (and eveyone that actually reads this!)

Chapter Three: Meet Edward.

I was lying on a cloud.  
So soft, so sleepy..gentle, white softness sourrounds me. It covers and protects me. I wonder why I'm even concious whilst lying on this delicious cloud.  
That's when the obnoxious call breaks through the barrier of my sheets.

"Wake up!" a voice bellows. I decide to ignore and try and drift back off to my luxurious cloud. "Hmph! MOM!! Edward won't WAKE UP!"

I hear a vague shuffling, and the opening of my closet. Then, I recognise the voice: Alice.

"Get out," I mumbled sleepily "and leave my clothes alone."

I hear a loud bang and what sounds suspiciously like a war cry. Suddenly I can't breathe.

"Wake up, wake up, wake up! Eddie boy!"

Fully awake - and winded - I manage to yell, "GET OFF ME EMMETT"  
I hear sniggering from the corner, and look to see Jasper about to wet himself. I hope he does; it would serve him right.

Emmett rolled off me and onto the floor with a loud thud.

"What's wrong?!" Came my mother Esme's worried voice from downstairs.

"Emmett," was Alice's only reply. My big brother Emmett, empahsis on big, was always crashing about the house like a bull in a china shop.

Jasper, still laughing like a hyena, was also my brother, one year older than my seventeen, and two years younger than Emmett's twenty. He had blonde hair and is,  
apparantly, 'hot'.

Alice. How can anyone explain Alice? She's more like an experience than a person. She was tiny and bubbly, and always looked at the glass half-full, with a chance of a free re-fill. I considered Alice my sister, and my parents, Carlisle and Esme Cullen, considered her their daughter long before they adopted her officially.

Alice was abandoned at an orphanage in Seattle when she was almost five. We can only assume that her parents left her because she was different. We liked to call her psychic, though she really just had feelings, but if Alice said she thought it was going to rain out, then I'd take an umberella. She didn't always have these feelings,  
just occasionally, but they were rarely wrong. Anyway, one day when she and the other children were on a trip to Forks (to look at wildlife and such) Alice took ill. She was rushed to the hospital where Dr. Carlisle Cullen discovered that she had appendicitus and had to have it removed. During her stay and recovery, my father took a shining to Alice, and when he introduced her to Esme, they instantly had a bond.

Soon though, Alice was well enough to go home. My parents talked about it, and decided that after having three boys, that a little girl would be nice, Alice being the perfect little girl. So they adopted her. I was only the same age as Alice, but we all know the story of how Alice managed to enchant my parents. My brothers and I weren't jealous though. Each of us took to Alice. Emmett becoming protective, Alice and I becoming close confidants, and Jasper and Alice... Well, they got close, too.

When Alice was sixteen, Jasper seventeen, they told the family that they were in love (Alice had already told me). My parents thought it was just be a phase, but even though they were young, anyone could see the love in the others eyes when they looked at each other. My parents got used to it, and so did everyone else.  
We were the talk of the town for a while, but everyone realised what we did: they were in love, and were going to be together forever, no matter what. They weren't blood-related, so what was the problem? A year later, and they were still going strong. He was the yang to her yin.

"Alice, get out of my closet. You are NOT dressing me." I knew she was about to whine and pout and six A.M was way too early for me to resist Alice's pout, so I did what any person would do when faced with an insane sister who desired to dress them like a doll; I threw my brother to wolves. "Emmett's meeting Rosalie tonight, and I'm sure he needs to look nice for her."

Rosalie was Emmett's girlfriend. They've been together almost as long as Jasper and Alice, and although their love wasn't as intense as Jasper and Alice's, it was filled with passion. The noises coming form my brother's room the nights Rose stayed over alerted the whole house to how passionate their love was. Rosalie, to put it mildly, was gorgeous. Men, and sometimes women, from eight to eighty all envied Emmett for having Rosalie Hale with her long blonde hair, that appeared to be woven from pure sunshine, startling blue eyes and brilliant smile.

She was more than just a pretty face though. She owned - courtesy of her parents - her very own garage in Forks that thrived and frequently got business from Seattle, to those that knew of her incredible skill with vehicles of all kinds.

She was amazing, Rosalie and I were too alike to ever be as close as Alice and I. It took us months, and me realising how much Emmett loved her, to finally start being civil to each other. Soon we bonded and we now got on fairly well, with just the odd argument.

Alice was beautiful too, as dark as Rosalie was light. Where Rose had pale skin, Alice a tanned, golden-brown body - depite the lack of Forks sun. Alice had inky black hair, darker than the night sky, and Rosalie's a bright gold.

Alice pounced on the date that Emmett had conveniently forgotten to mention and dragged him out of my room to scour his wardrobe for something 'casual, yet smart' so he wouldn't 'embarrass the family or Rosalie'. With that hassle out of the way, I shot a meaningful look at Jasper. When he still didn't move I informed him, "I'm going to get changed, so get out."

He left, but on his way out he said, "Alice said to put on the blue shirt, and black pants with the same shoes you wore yesterday, because, and I quote, 'you will look so cute!'" He quoted Alice in her high, melodious voice and left smirking at me, knowing once again that his girlfriend had won. Again.

X&X&X&X&X&X&X&X&X&X&X&X&X

I had been fed to bursting point by my mother, dressed by Alice, teased be Emmett, laughed at by Jasper and hugged by my father. A normal day so far.

As I was on my way out with Jasper and Alice (I drove and they sat in the back seat looking into each others eyes), when a thought occurred to me.  
"Is Rose staying tonight Emmett?"

"Yeah, why?"

"I was just wondering if she'd take a look a my car and see if she can make it go any faster."

Emmett rolled his eyes, and told me to 'be on my way'. Rosalie had already looked at my silver Volvo a number of times, and every other time she did it went a little faster. It was my main pleasure in life, to drive as fast as I could and was only surpassed by my love of the piano. I liked to create new melodies, expressing joy, pain,  
happiness and other amazing emotions.

Alice was the artist of my family, forever jotting down clothes designs, and Jasper was the writer, painting complex and splendorous stories with his words. Emmett, perhaps surprisingly, was the poet of the family, after charming Rosalie with letters and and love odes before she would grant him a date. It was funny to watch my eldest brother fall in love and write soppy love poems to a girl. We knew after the poems it was serious, because he would never do that with anyone else.

Alice and Jasper were already in the car, getting in some extra time staring at each other before school (our next destination) when I saw her.

The angel.

Z&Z&Z&Z&Z&Z&Z&Z&Z&Z&Z&Z&Z

A/N Okay, so here's the latest chapter, what do you think? The story will take off soon, and they'll meet properly next chapter...or the chapter after.  
So stay tuned, and thank you for reading. Thanks to Marie, for taking the mistakes out of this chapter (or decipherring it) and generally making it readable. 


	5. Life meets Death 's daughter

_**Disclaimer:**_ I don't own Twilight.

Chapter Four: Life meets Death ('s daughter)

Know why you have graveyards? They're the barrier between life and erm...where I come from. Graveyards are where rich earth, brilliant flowers, and life giving trees meet death. Literally.

I stepped onto the green, freshly cut grass into the quiet cemetery, full of weeping angels, and other memorials. Maria met me with a small wave after looking sadly at

a small headstone set into the soft earth. I had on my normal attire, consisting of worn jeans and a plain black t-shirt. I also had sunglasses daintily perched over my eyes to protect them from the sun until they could get used to the brightness. Of all the things I was desperate to see and experience, the sun was at the top of my list. I went to look up at the sun when horror struck.

"WHERE'S THE SUN?!"

The sky was grey and completely covered in clouds. There were peeks of light here and there, but where was the hot sun I saw on TV?

"You're in Forks, Bella...there is no sun. Well, there is, just not the type you mean. Light, but no heat," Maria answered calmly.

"But...but...I...I thought you were joking. I mean who names a town after a piece of cutlery?" I said dejectedly.

"I, erm..." Maria looked thoughtful for a second.

"Anyway, the locals tell me there is sun sometimes."

"'The locals'?" Great, this just got worse. "What do you mean, 'the locals'? Aren't you local?"

"Stop saying local. You're making it sound funny, and no. I live in Seattle, but your mother and I talked about it and decided for now, seeing as it's your first time with humans - that are alive - it would be better to," Maria hesitated, "ease you into the human world. So, that's how you ended up in Forks. Near me in Seattle, but with a small population and it's own high school."

Seeing my frown was still in place, she said we should go see my new house.

&X&X&X&X&X&X&X&X&X&X&X&X&X&X&X

"I'm in love," I breathed as I got out of Maria's Aston Martin and looked up at the pale blue Victorian styled house in front of me. It was breath taking, like the white mansion neighbouring it. It was huge - far too big for one person - and it had ivy winding round the pillars of the house, leading up to the second story.

I followed Maria up the white wooden steps and through the cream front door into a fully furnished home. My home. I lunged at Maria and threw my arms round her, yelling thank you's. My over enthusiastic hug cause us both to fall on to the soft carpet.

We giggled and went upstairs after going through the beautiful wooden kitchen. We bypassed all the other rooms until Maria came to a halt at a white door.

"I thought you may like this room," was all she said by way of explanation.

I opened it and sucked in a breath at the pure beauty of the room, it had a large, dark four-poster bed with each of the four column's rising up to form trees. Around the dark wood bed were varying shades of green voile, some twisting round the bed in an imitation of vines, others just draping delicately over each corner of the bed. The floor was wooden, old and real and it was stained a dark brown that was just a shade shy of the brown of the bed. One wall was painted a rich green. The other three walls were painted a pale moss green. Each wall was had intricate gold patterns, obviously hand painted. It was beautiful.

While my favourite colours often depended on my mood, I always had a soft spot for green. It reminded me of forests and plants: nature, and in turn, nature reminded me of my mother. The living plants, often so still and unmoving like the dead. I supposed the green foliage of Forks would help ease any bouts of home sickness that might creep up on me. But there was no sun. Isn't America supposed to be sunny? It is on TV. I pushed the absence of the sun I had been craving to the back of my mind and focused on all the other opportunities I would have.

"It's beautiful, Maria. Thank you, thank you for thinking about me - I know you did this." I turned to survey the room again and noticed a set of traditional white French doors. I crept to the other side of the room, and opened the door cautiously, wondering what would await me on the other side.

It was a balcony. It had a black wrought iron railing that had a trellis along side it, a lot like the house opposite actually. The side wall opposite my room was the mirror image of my balcony, with

a trellis alongside it, so that plants could wrap around the iron in a tender caress, further adding beauty to the picture. The only differences were the opposite railing was white where mine was black and my balcony had matching black, wrought iron steps curving back to the ground. The balcony was a fairly large and was in the shape of a semi-circle, the curve looking out to the next house. It was as I was glancing across to the next house I saw him.

I'm sure my heart actually beat when his eyes met mine.

The twin emerald orbs pierced my black eyes. His bright, shimmering green gaze connecting intimately with my lifeless black pools. Our personal moment - for that's all it took to read the brilliance of him through his eyes - was ruined by loud yell.

"EDWARD! MOVE IT!"

I looked towards the noise and saw a blur of black dash back into a silver Volvo. I barely registered the voice or the car because I knew his name. Edward. _Edward_. My mind savoured his name, and my heart was thrilled that I knew more about the God in front of me. His faced became frustrated and he turned to the car and bellowed back angrily, "I AM COMING!"

As he turned back to yell, I ducked into the safety of the room. Safe because how could a heart as dead as mine seemingly beat with just a look?

I saw him search the balcony in confusion, through the blinds, and then give up with a sigh and get into the car and drive off. My heart sang at the sight of him, and wept at his departure. What the _hell_ was wrong with me?

X&X&X&X&X&X&X&X&X&X&X&X&X&X&X&X

_This was a stupid idea. I am stupid. But that smile...Still, technically, I think I could be arrested for this_, I thought. Instead of planting my feet back safely on the ground, I carried on up. As my foot slipped into yet another bed of thorns, I cursed silently and wondered why anyone would want dangerous - and scratchy - flowers, like roses. Sure, they looked all sweet and innocent, but then you go to sniff it, and WHAM! You have a thorn in you.

"Curse you liking gardening, Mrs." Realising I didn't even know his last name, I faltered, "Edward's Mom," I muttered.

I was just reaching the top of the trellis. Almost there. Another step and-

"DAMN!" I yelled, after falling from the pretty white trellis covered in roses that surrounded their house. What was this place? A prison? I had just been about to reach the holy grail: Edward's room. I decided my backside hurt way to much to even contemplate getting up (or movement of any kind), so I stayed on the ground, thinking about my new favourite subject: Edward. His smile, his eyes -

"Who are you?!" came a disembodied voice from the dark.

"Carlisle, turn the light on. You won't be able to see anything, it's pitch black out here!" came a gentle, concerned female voice.

"Esme, I didn't turn the light on as to capture an element of surprise. Darling, I thought I told you stay in bed! What if someone hurts you?"

Carlisle? Esme? Edward's parents? _Crap, this does __**not**__ bode well_, I thought.

"Oh, hush, Carlisle" came Esme's soft voice again.

"Yeah, Dad, do what Mom says." came a taunting voice.

"Emmett! Shut up!" Came a fourth kind, female voice.

"What's going on?" Person number five.

"ALICE! I told you stay upstairs!" Make that six.

Where these people congregating or something?

"What's going on?" came another voice. But this one I recognised. It was angelic, yet groggy. Of course, the last time I heard it, it was yelling at someone.

I remained still on the floor, highly amused at the antics of what appeared to be the family as a whole.

"We are in the process of being robbed, and your mother decided she wanted some random yob to attack her."

"Carlisle," came the reproving reply, "I'm fine, but now all of our children are out here, and there's someone lying with their feet in my prize rose bush."

I flew from the ground, starting to get a distinct dislike of roses and all plantation in general.

A bright light came on, and illuminated the lawn, showing seven figures. All of them were in nightclothes. I suddenly felt a little out of place in my all-black attire. The eldest male, probably in

his mid-thirties was holding a baseball bat in an attempt to look frightening and warn off and "burglars". The next male I looked at didn't need any weapons to be intimidating; he was naturally muscled, and terrifying. The woman I assumed to be Edward's mother - Esme - had hair the colour of honey that flowed down her back and curled softly and the ends. Next to her was a beautiful girl who had long blonde hair, the colour of sunshine, her features perfectly symmetrical and the face

every model craves but few have.

My gaze strayed to a figure jumping up and down excitedly. She was tiny, with short inky black hair and wore bright pink pyjama's and bounced even higher as I looked at her. I made a mental memo to ask Edward if she was on drugs. If I ever got the courage to speak to him, that is.

My eyes roamed to the tall pale haired man who stood next to her, his arm curled protectively around her waist, his features seeming to analyse me. Five had their mouths open, regarding me with varying expressions: wariness, amusement and disbelief. The small one on drugs, and Edward were the only ones who didn't have a glint in their eyes that branded me insane. They had smiles.

All I wanted to do was get a good look at the cute guy I saw from my balcony. I shook my head. If my first night on Earth was this eventful, imagine what my first day of school would be like.

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A/N So this is my attempt at humour, let me know if it was okay, or just awful. Thanks for taking the time to read (and, hopefully, review)

Thank you Marie. You're awesome. Even ) thinks so; he told me.


	6. School

Chapter Five: School

I was in my car, trying to escape from the aura of love surrounding Jasper and Alice, while at the same time trying to hide from Jessica Stanley who appeared to be stalking me lately. Jessica seemed to have decided that I was shy around her, and as soon as we left behind high School I would ask her to marry me; I overheard her last week, hence hiding from her.

Alice and Jasper were a slightly different story. I was in a house with six individuals who were all in love. I was the seventh and had no partner to talk to, to hold, to just exist with, not that I minded; I'm perfectly happy alone. I believe in soul mates – how could I not with my family all so in love – yet I didn't believe that they were two parts of one, that they couldn't be complete alone. I was the example for that. Anyway, sometimes I just had to get away from the constant love that, instead of being soothing and safe, sometimes felt suffocating.

It was as I was contemplating that no one understood me that I saw her again. The girl from the window. The girl from last night. The girl of my dreams. _Where did _that_ come from?_ I questioned myself. She walked into the school gates with a large bag and her face turned toward the sky, wearing a slight frown. I angled my own head upwards in an attempt to see what she was seeing, to know what she was thinking. I got nothing. It was a normal day in Forks, a little more sun than usual, but grey clouds still swarmed the sky. She looked ahead and went into a building.

I watched as she travelled from the main office office seemingly oblivious to the curious, hungry, jealous and awed looks she was receiving. She kept her head down, her eyes trained on a piece of paper – probably her class schedule. I left the safe cocoon of my car, practically drawn to her. She looked up for a moment, and turned seeing the building she was due to be in and walked that way. The girl carried on and I watched with growing horror as I realised what was about to happen. I ran in an attempt to stop the scene I could see unfolding in front of my eyes, but I was too late.

I arrived at her side just as she bounced from the hard wooden door she had walked into and fell to the floor on her backside ungracefully. I held out my hand in an attempt to be gentlemanly, even as a snicker found it's way through my defenses. She took my hand and looked up at me in annoyance. She stopped as she saw me.

_Did she recognise me?_ I thought as my body filled with elation that _maybe_ she knew who I was. My stubborn mind quickly attacked and killed those thoughts.

"I'm sorry, but would you care to share with me just what you find so funny?" she asked irritably. I barely heard her words as my ears were to busy rejoicing at the sweet sound that they heard. Again, I managed to quietly smother my emotions.

"Just the fact that you seem to always land in the same position." I replied, referring to the previous night. She bowed her head in an effort to stop me seeing her mortified face. I wondered if she was going to blush.

"Well...I...er...uh..Look, just tell your parents thank you again please. You know, for not calling the police or anything."

Me and the other "kids" had been banished to bed after my parents saw that it was just a harmless teenage girl that had been in our garden, not a thug who wanted to attack our mother. All they would say on the matter this morning was that she lived next door (which I already knew) and that she "had lost something over the fence" (which I didn't believe)

I realised that she was probably expecting an answer and delighted that she was still gripping the hand that helped her.

"Oh, no problem. They're pretty easy going, for parents anyway."

She smiled, although there seemed to be a curious longing, resided in her dark eyes. Today they looked more dark brown than black but still immensely beautiful. She came out of whatever part of her head she had dived into and said, "Well, I've got math now, so I'd better be going...Bye."

Her hesitant goodbye smile had my heart fluttering and my head wishing I could see her smile with, no hesitance, no boundaries. Both agreed it would be a sight they would very much like to see. I shook my head and went the opposite way to my own class.

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I saw Bella going in the general direction I was going in and was about to catch up to her when Mike Newton jumped in instead. In my position, just a few feet behind them, I was in the perfect position to eavesdrop. I, of course, wouldn't do that because my mother raised me to be a gentleman – I eavesdropped. She was hard to read, and I wanted to assure myself that she wouldn't be like the many other girls in the school and decide she was "in love" with Mike.

Most girls had long since stopped scrawling _Mrs Edward Cullen _into their books after Emmett spread a rumour that I was gay a little while back. It's probably the only one of his practical jokes that worked to my advantage.

Anyway, back to my eavesdropping.

"Hi, I'm Mike." said the nasally voice.

"Hi Mike. I'm-" as she was about to share her name with him – out of politeness...I hope – he cut her off and answered for her, sounding like a five-year-old unwrapping a much anticipated Christmas gift. One with a severe nasal problem. Did he develop that whiney voice over the weekend, or was it just me?

"Isabella!" he announced. What did he want – a prize?

"Yes, but I prefer Bella," she reprimanded gently.

"Sure. So...Bella..."

"Yes, Bella." She repeated.

"Sure...So, what's up?"

Bella looked confused at his question for a moment, tilted her head to the side, as if confused, and replied, "The sky."

It came out more question than answer and it brought a snicker to my lips that I barely managed to conceal. I couldn't hide the strange half-smile thing that came to my lips as a result of me trying to repress my laughter, yet not being totally able to. The fact that something even so small as an expression being out of my control was an annoyance to me. I liked to be in control of my emotions. In control of myself. _Maybe I'd better stay away from Bella. _My treacherous heart flinched at the idea and I knew that it wasn't an option. Maybe if I'd had years of denying myself...but I hadn't, so it was a moot point.

I brought my attention back to their conversation as Newton stopped to think about that answer as Bella shrugged and continued on to her class. Biology.

I also had biology and because I also had biology, I knew that the only available seat was next to me. I grinned and went to class happier than I'd been to go to class in a long time.

I passed Jasper, who asked curiously, "Why are you so happy?"

I wasn't entirely sure myself, so I just gave a small wave and carried on.

So what did you think to her first day of school? I decided to do it in Edward's POV, because A) it was his turn and B) I thought it would be interesting to see day one from his POV for a change. Bella will tell you all about the biology lesson next chapter though, and then they'll get to know each other.

As usual, thank you Marie. You know my stories would be awful without your brilliant English skills. (I just can't be bothered with grammar and 'stuff', much to my old English teacher's annoyance)

And of course, thank you to the people who read this!

Have a good day. And enjoy Breaking Dawn!


	7. Biology Or should that be Chemistry?

**Disclaimer: I own none of the Twilight series.**

**C**hapter Five:

Biology...or should that be chemistry?

I walked on to biology, wondering if I had said the wrong thing to Mick. Mike! Not Mick, _Mike_. _Mental note: Blonde-ish puppy is Mike_. I was wondering over our conversation, minutes before.

"_Sure...So, what's up?"_

"_The sky."_

That was the logical answer though, the sky? I suppose he could've meant a plane, or bird, but "sky" was the natural answer. I decided that maybe Mike wasn't the brightest bulb in the box – he didn't look it - and carried on to class unconcerned.

Just as I thought my my feet were starting to obey me, my face hit the floor. I sighed and gathered the general class paraphernalia and walked on. I tried to walk slower this time, as the floor probably recognised my face better than my feet they met so often. I saw the back of Edward Cullen, as he sped a ahead of me and almost sighed out loud. Actually sighed. With delight. _What is wrong with you?! _

I finally arrived at the biology room, relatively unscathed from my falls. I had spent so long tripping and then trying to be careful, that the class was already full. Mike sat sullenly next to Eric, was it? He also looked sullen, Jessica sat rigidly with a scowl on her face that looked like it could become a snarl any second. I made an effort not to get too close to her in case she bit me. The teacher, Mr Banner, looked bored and a little put out at having to teach a room full of children – despite the fact he was paid for it. Actually, the only person who _wasn't_ wearing some sort of negative expression was Edward. My heart did a graceful jump, and refused to settle, while my stomach took example and started to churn. Why? Edward was looking in my direction, his eyes staring at the door so hard he didn't seem to realise I had arrived for a moment, then he did the unthinkable. He smiled at me.

That smile looked like a ray of sun falling effortlessly and gracefully from the sky to land upon a wilting plant, (the plant would be me) and restore it's life and it's hope. Edward, I thought, could stop wars with that smile. Hell, he could probably end world hunger as a whole because he was such a feast for the senses. My eyes proved this as I stopped, simply to stare allowing my eyes to gorge on the sight of his slightly messy hair, blue shirt and amazing green eyes. I regained my senses (partially – he was still in the room and looking at me. _Me!_) I remembered I was in the middle of an important task – walking. _Right, time to move Bella_. I sternly told myself.

Unfortunately my mind was still muddled, and not fully in control of my body. I would never have noticed if I hadn't walked into Mr. Banner, who had moved from behind his desk to reach for and sign the slip I held, fell to the floor. He seemed a bit shocked by the cold temperature of my hands (I had completely covered the rest of my body as it was a rainy day in Forks, so the only thing anyone could touch was my hands until I de-bundled) but visibly pulled himself together and told me to go sit down. Sit. Next to Edward.

_Don't freak out Bella, you can do this...just try not to trip. And crush your crush. _I almost smiled at the irony of that thought.

I sat tentatively on the stool next to Edward, as if the seat may burn me any minute. I relaxed my body by will power alone and took my seat.

He turned to look at me almost immediately as our dedicated teacher wheeled in an ancient VCR that looked older than me. Well, my fake age at least. He put a tape in that made a noise and we were watching our biology lesson. _Truly the 21__st__ Century. _The lights went out and, was that a pillow Mr. Banner pulled from his desk drawer? He rested his head, and said, "Be quiet." before his light snores reached my sensitive ears.

A nondescript video played and I didn't pay attention. Something about cells, I think. Who cared about cells when my body was screaming at the physical nearness of Edward? Not me. Which surprised me, as I was usually very academic, always trying to find new books to read, new material to learn and ways to expand my mind. He turned and looked at me, and lifted an eyebrow as I realised with humiliation that I had been staring at his profile as he kept his eyes trained to the screen.

"Good conversation with Mike?" he asked, pleasantly.

"Mike. Mike." I muttered, trying to out a face to the name. I had a large memory, but I often failed to remember things if they didn't interest me. Selective thinking, I suppose. I guess 'Mike' didn't interest me. Edward must have heard my chant and he laughed with, was that joy?

"That's Mike. The guy over there," he pointed to the sky guy, "the boy who is staring at you and glaring at me." I turned again, and sure enough, he was alternating between stares and glares. I just said, "oh," and turned back to the screen.

"I'm Edward, by the way." his mouth lifted slightly.

"I know. You play piano, right?"

His mouth opened as if he was going to gasp, but no sound came out.

"How do you know that?"

"Your parents told me. Your mom seemed really proud of you, your dad too."

"I should've known. My mother often likes to brag."

"Mmhmm." I quieted, not sure what to say next.

"You're not brilliant at this conversation thing I'm trying to engage you in, are you?"

"Sorry, I'm socially retarded."

The words were out of my mouth before I could stop them. _Way to go Bella, now he probably thinks you're mentally retarded too! _The stern half of me yelled, the 'devil' on my shoulder. The angel was much more sympathetic_. You know, it's really a shame that life doesn't come with a trapdoor that can swallow you when you say something as stupid as what you've just said. _Okay, so maybe 'devil' nor 'angel' helped all that much.

To my utter surprise, instead of edging his stool away, he just laughed. Mr. Banner must've heard the raised voices – other groups in the class had taken to talking – as he woke up and said, "Shut up!" rather groggily. When no one obeyed his poor command, he sighed another long suffering sigh, and reluctantly put his pillow away. It was as he moved to put it back in his drawer that I cursed the brilliant eyesight that allowed me to see a damp patch of his drool from many seats away. _Ew._

After that the class was forced to be silent, and I saw sky guy (Mike) heading my way, so I dashed out of the class before I could get trapped in any more awkward social situations.

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The bell that had saved me from biology was also the bell signifying lunch. I decided to go to the cafeteria, having not bothered to pack a lunch because I was to lazy to. That was mainly due to the 'games' room that I had found in one of the many unneeded rooms in my new home.

The room was a pale blue colour, but it had posters over the walls. There were posters of movies; The Breakfast Club, Pretty in Pink, James Bond, The Phantom of the Opera, posters of bands and artists; The Kinks, Billy Joel, Blondie, Muse and other various bands I liked. There was also posters of characters like; the Simpsons, The Futurama cartoons, a large picture of Pinky and the Brain and, possibly my favourite Mr Darcy and Elizabeth Bennett on an English moor. There were television screens and many games consoles, and almost a whole wall of games. All I needed was the phone numbers for various take outs, and I would be in teenage nirvana.

However, I digress. It was as I opened one of the doors to the cafeteria that the noise hit me full force. (I was thinking of my nirvana) It appeared the whole population of Forks high had wedged themselves into the room before me. The walls were painted white and stained dark cream, with cracks decorating them. As I crossed the threshold, all activity and chatter ceased.

The stares of fellow pupils bored into my back as their eyes followed me, silently, to line for food. _Don't trip Bella._ I ordered myself, hoping to avoid public humiliation,_ for the love of all things holy, don't fall with all these people watching you! _Unused to the amount of people - with heartbeats at least - in the room, I felt on show and guessed that I'd be twice as likely to land on my face with a ton of people watching me like an avid audience. I kept my head down and prayed to any entity listening that the line would shorten.

Finally it did, and I grabbed a large tray full of food, not looking at what I picked up. I just wanted to pay and be gone. I handed the correct amount of money over and, still keeping my head down, moved as fast as I could without running towards the door.

My first idea was to go to the library where I knew I would find the smell of old books comforting, but I glanced down at the mountain of food in my arms and realised I would never be able to even sneak it in. Instead I wandered for a short time, until I came across my last classroom. I stepped into the biology room and seated myself in the space I had not long left.

It felt comfortable. Not as soothing as the library, but away from staring eyes, at least.

"What are you doing?" came a muffled voice. I jumped. _How pitiful. You are the child of death itself and you start at a voice? _It seemed my inner monologue wasn't playing nice today. Actually, it seemed to be being downright bitchy.

"Erm...eating." I replied to Mr. Banner, who seemed to have separated his head from his pillow. It seemed the smell of hot food was enticing him, as his nose twitched comically, almost like a rabbits.

"You're going to eat all that?"

"I don't know," I said a little defensively, "maybe." His eyes widened a little, and I looked down and saw, as if for the first time, the substantial amount of food I carried.

"Probably not. Would you like some?" I asked, not really expecting him to say yes. He did and that was how, the small one on drugs, or "ALICE!" found me counselling my biology teacher on his rocky marriage, sharing my food, seeing as his wife refused to cook or make his lunch for him any more.

"I just don't understand," he was saying as the small figure burst into the room, "we've never had problems before. I mean, the odd tiff when I forgot our anniversary, and then that week of no sex when I forget her birthday. I can't help it if I'm forgetful! And then she says her mother's coming...that started off a whole new argument. That woman drives me crazy! Northing's right, I don't earn enough, I'm too old to give her decent grandchildren at 'my age'. You don't want to hear about the fight we had about her driving-"

"What are you doing?" the small, raven-haired girl asked me. Before I could utter a word, or ask to be formally introduced, Mr Banner spoke.

"Just talking about the wife. I don't understand her at all-" he started his speech again, and I sent Alice a look begging for help.

She cut into his conversation politely, saying, "You should talk to Jasper, he's very empathetic." then pushed the tall blonde boy, from the previous night and this morning, into my space and dragging me out the door. I hadn't even noticed Jasper standing silently behind her, he seemed almost part of her aura, part of Alice. I didn't have much time to ponder over that thought though, as Alice began speaking.

"I'm Alice Cullen!" she exclaimed proudly and thrust her hand out towards me.

She seemed so bubbly and upbeat that I couldn't help but smile at her and her tone. She appeared to be one of those people who has an exclamation mark at the end of every sentence, but not in an annoying way, like most. In a sweet, infectious way. I liked her instantly.

"I'm Bella" I grinned back.

"I know. My parents told me after you broke into our yard. What was that about anyway?" Before had chance to stutter a lie, she had already carried on to her next topic, "You just moved in next door, right? No need to answer- I watched all your stuff being delivered through my brother's window. I like your cream sofa by the way - very tasteful. Anyway, I think we would be great friends. Would you like to come to my house tonight?"

I was about to politely decline – how could I face the rest of her family again?! - when she interrupted me.

"My parents will be out, my dad has some doctor function they have to go to, and my eldest brother, Emmett, will probably be making out – or more, God forbid - with his girlfriend Rosalie in their room, then Edward usually just sits in his room, being moody, listen to music or playing his piano. So it'll probably just be you and me, maybe Jasper. I don't know, we'll have to see. But pleeease come! Please! It'll be so much fun, and we'll have a movie night, and I can give you a make over!"

I was still unsure, even though my will was quickly being broken by the pout she wore and the big eyes she sported.

"I'll even let you pick the film." That was it, I was in.

"Okay, I'll bring the movie." I asked. She just nodded, grinned and threw, "Be there at 6!" Over her shoulder as she walked away.

Jasper came out the room a minute later, as I will still getting over Alice's overwhelming presence, and he looked around questioningly. I wordlessly pointed him in the right direction and he nodded his thanks and followed her.

I went in to the science room to retrieve my bag – most of my lunch had been consumed by Mr. Banner – and made my way to the library.

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As soon as I had gotten clear of the school, and any other signs of life, I went into the forest and began to run. I can run as fast as my vampire 'cousins' and completely enjoy the feeling, and the high I get when running at such a speed.

After a minute or so, I decided to walk and take in my surroundings. I examined the delicate green leaves that wrapped themselves around the brown branches in an attempt to reach the sky. I turned a full 360 and found that everything was green. I looked around in an attempt to find the brown of the sturdy tree trunks and found green moss, I glanced at the sky and found a canopy of leaves – all green. In desperate hope, I led my eyes to the ground and found grass, more moss and other foliage. There were bits of brown earth, and a few pale flowers. Resigned to the fact that my new life on earth had only slightly much more colour than my old one -everything natural was black, including the sky - I sat and rested my head in my hands, wondering if I had made a hasty decision.

The kids at school terrified me, and talked about fashions and celebrities, and from what I gathered, they never read a thing more substantial than Seventeen magazine. I came to Forks to look for myself. I lived with my mother, so my 'dead half' was well explored, and I didn't feel like I truly fit there. Desperation – and stupidity, it seemed – drove me to explore the other half of me and come to Forks to see if I belonged here. I obviously didn't. It felt as if the two halves that made up my unnatural being were constantly at war with each other. The human and dead side of me made sure that the other was never at home anywhere.

So I sat, feeling sorry for myself, and waiting for the tears that would never, could never, come. I have no idea how long I sat that way, the cold didn't affect me and I had no need for sustenance of any kind, when I heard a strange noise. It was that noise that made me instantly alert and pulled me out of my self-pitying misery.

I rocked forward to my knees, ready to pounce in a second, silent, still and statuesque with my whole body tensed. My eyes searched the now dark forest and I let me heightened my senses guide me. (They are always there, but my smelling, hearing and seeing too much all the time was confusing, so I blocked them out, much like people do with a sound they don't want to listen to; they dull it so they can only vaguely hear it)

Out of a particularly large piece of, you guessed it, green bushes, a large dog came padding out towards me. As it came nearer, I realised that it wasn't a dog at all, but a wolf. A fairly large one too. I decided to leave it alone, assuming it would sniff me and go away, and grabbed my bag and sped back to my luxury house. _Not home. I have no idea where my home is_, I thought sadly.

I was digging through my bag in order to find my door key, when something soft brushed against my hand. I jumped and squealed slightly at the unfamiliar sensation and looked down to see it was the wolf I had met in the forest. With the light shining over my door, I got a good look at the wolf, and saw it was stunning. Sleek muscles were covered with soft russet fur, and it had dark, intelligent eyes. Despite the wolf's large size, I felt at ease with the creature, safe even.

"You are so soft," I cooed to the animal as I rubbed it's ears, "and so pretty. No, not pretty; handsome. You're definitely a boy. So, we need a boys name for you."

I shouldn't have mentioned naming it; that implied I was keeping it. Even so, I found that I had to be close to this animal, to be near it and absorb it's soothing presence. This creature had come into my life when I needed it most, when I was confused, scared and lonely and I couldn't just abandon it. If I learned anything from all my time ''alive'' it was that you cannot stop fate, and if fate brought this wolf into my life, then it was for a good reason.

"What shall we call you then? Hmm?" I asked it, looking into his smart eyes.

"Something with a J?Jay's good? You seem like you should have a 'J' somewhere in your name." I paused for a moment to think, "How about... Justin?" It seemed to frown at me. "Jackson?" It's eyes looked at me almost incredulously, with an 'are-you-serious' look?

"Okay," I laughed, "What about Jack? No, no! Jake!" It seemed to have no obvious aversion to being called Jake, so my pet wolf was now called Jake. I sat on my step with my eyes closed, stroking his fur and letting peace consume me.

My eyes flew open when I heard a voice – a very familiar voice – ask,

"What the _hell_ are you doing?!"

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**A/N – **And so we finish. Sorry if it's a sucky chapter, it isn't one of my faves, but I like it. I think. So can you do me a favour and let me know if you like it? Or if I screwed up a simple chapter.

Also, my thanks to Marie for assuring me this chapter isn't completely awful.

**Simkid** : Whether you want it or not, I dedicate this chapter to you, as a thanks for that line you're letting me use. (and I defiantly will in a later chapter) Unfortunately though, I couldn't PM you and thank you, so you have my thanks here. XD

I know this A/n is getting longer than the chapter, but after many times of forgetting, I have some links on my profile for this story if you want to see them. And there is a song for this chapter too. 'Biology' by Girls Aloud. (It seemed fitting) So enjoy.

_O_nce again,thank you for reading!


	8. I'm Christine?

**Song**: Edwin Collins - Never me a girl like like you before.

Disclaimer.

**Chapter : **

I'm Christine?

A wolf. She was sitting with a _wolf!_

Not a small, cute one either, a great big beast of a wolf. _Didn't she understand that this_ monster _could kill her?! _I controlled my anger briefly enough to wonder why I cared, before I could wonder at the thought any more, anger came over me as the wolf licked her. _Licked her!_

"What. Are. You. _Doing_?!" I forced out through gritted teeth. Bella seemed shocked for a moment, and her expression – one of wariness – reminded me to control my tempter that was was often quick to ignite.

"Edward, really. I'll tell Jake not to dig near Esme's plants." she said calmly.

"The plants?" I repeated stupidly, breathlessly. She thought I was worried about the _plants_?! I turned to look at my mother's roses, their beauty turned to mere attractiveness next to her radiant face and deep eyes. Those wondrous eyes I could stare into all day, trying to decipher the secrets and emotions they held. The emotion at the moment appeared to be confusion, it was then I realised that I hadn't spoken for a while.

"I don't care about the plants Bella." I said in what I hoped was a calm voice, yet even I recognised the strain there, "I care that you are sitting next to a large wolf, with very large teeth – didn't you ever read fairy tales? It could be dangerous Bella."

"You care?" She breathed so softly, I only just managed to hear it.

It broke my heart to see her amazed that someone would care. I was wondering what to say to make it better – the animal at her side forgotten – when I heard my sister.

"EDWARD! You were meant to get Bell-" Her voice cut off immediately at the sight of us staring at each other, her in wonder me wondering what to say. Or perhaps it was the sight of the large wolf that sat in front of Bella, who knows? Alice was, is and always will be a total enigma.

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"Bella, you may or may not know this, but Edward has a 24/7 erection for you to play with whenever you want." I heard Emmett say from the living room.

A short time ago – after convincing Bella to leave that _thing _at her house – Bella had gathered her stuff and came to my house to watch a movie of her choice.

I didn't know whether to be overjoyed with Alice or to kill her after I found out she had invited Bella. Despite any reservations I had, I volunteered to escort Bella from her house at 6pm.

"What?!" Bella practically screeched. I took my time getting Bella's Pepsi, as I already knew this joke of Emmett's. This time I managed to find the humour in it however, unlike the time he said something similar to a seventy-year old.

"Ewww, Bella get your mind out of the gutter. That's my _brother_! I was talking about his hair. Have you ever noticed how its always standing up? It's a hair erection." Emmett replied.

"Emmett." Rosalie warned. She didn't take an instant like to Bella, but she didn't take an instant dislike to her either. I think I understood Rosalie's reasoning somewhat.

Rosalie is from a wealthy family. She had all the material things she could ever want, yet her mother would rather spend time on her own retail therapy to avoid the agony of her husband's many mistresses. Rose didn't really have much of a family until she found Emmett, and now, she would do anything to protect it and the happy life she had created for herself. She was weary of Bella as she might be a threat to the life she had created and it would take time for her to care for Bella.

The rest of the family however, had took an instant liking to her. Emmett especially.

"Are you sure it's okay if we all watch the movie with you?" Rose asked. We had all decided to spend the night together. Just call us The Brady Bunch.

"Of course it's okay." Emmett answered for Bella.

"Is it Bella?" I asked her quietly whilst handing her her drink.

"Of course! I don't come from a big family, so it's nice to see you all together."

"You don't have any siblings?" Emmett asked.

"Nope. Just me and my Mom." Her eyes softened as she spoke of her mother I noted. I could see Emmett was about to question her further, so I intervened with a question of my own.

"What movie did you bring?" She smiled brightly and rummaged through her bag and came out holding _The Phantom of the Opera_ with a triumphant smile. Emmett groaned loudly. I thought about her choice, and the reflections it could have on her. I decided to observe her as she watched.

"Okay, we are watching _The Phantom Of the Opera_! Lights out and popcorn all round!" Alice called.

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Bella watched avidly as Raoul and Christine sang to one another as the Erik watched on in anguish.

I wondered at her reaction – something I seemed to be doing often lately – and I came to the conclusion that there had to be more than I was seeing. She reacted strongly, her eyes filling with pain and joy respectively.

As the film progressed, Bella and I seemed to be moving nearer and nearer to each other. Rosalie had sat on Emmett's lap in a large chair, Jasper had sprawled out on the sofa with his head resting on Alice's lap. This left Bella and I on the love seat.

She got closer and closer to me...or perhaps it was I that got closer to her, but each time one of us shifted there seemed to be less and less distance between us. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw Jasper look over at us, and nudge Alice.

"Rose, come with me a minute; I want to show that dress I was thinking of getting." Alice gently slid Jasper's head from her legs and lifted herself to her feet with grace.

"What dress? I thought you wanted to watch the movie..." Rosalie replied with some confusion.

"The dress, now come look before I drag you!"

Alice couldn't force anybody to move (not with her physical strength, at least) but she'd definitely try. Sometimes, when it came to Alice it was easier to submit than to argue, Rosalie obviously thought so, as she went without further argument.

I knew what Alice was trying to do, and I was in two minds about whether I approved or not.

"Yes!" Emmett said, once the girls were out of ear shot. "Jasper. I challenge you to an arm wrestle. The one you were a little girl about earlier and wormed out of."

"No, Emmett." Jasper replied.

"He's obviously too scared Emmett. He'll probably go run behind Alice's skirts and cry."

Emmett laughed and continued to taunt him.

"See Jasper; even _Edward_ thinks you're a coward."

"_Not_ appreciated Emmett." I said, as Bella paused the movie and snickered, he attention now focused on my brothers and I.

Jasper had had enough of the teasing, "That's pretty big talk coming from you Emmett. You know, considering Rosalie keeps your balls in her purse and loans them out to you."

"At least my girlfriend doesn't try to dress me in women's clothing!" Emmett shot back, yet he was still in good humour, along with Jasper.

"That was _ONE_ time Emmett! Let it drop already!"

I couldn't resist saying, "_One time_." Jasper grinned triumphantly, "That we know of."

Emmett grinned at me and burst out laughing when Jasper threw a pillow at me.

"See. Even _Edward_ thinks you act like a girl. And we're still trying to decide which team he bats for."

"Don't you bat for your brothers' team Edward?" Bella asked confused.

_Hmm, I guess they didn't have the same sort of phrases in- Where _was_ she from?_ My thoughts broke as Emmett found this hilarious.

Jasper smiled also, and suggested he and Emmett go play _Guitar Hero_, as Jasper would "kick Emmett's ass into next Tuesday."

Emmett readily took up the challenge – as he always does – and Bella and I were left alone on the love seat. The _love_ seat.

"I feel sorry for the phantom." I said to Bella, without thinking as Erik watched on heartbroken as Christine and Raoul shared a tender moment.

"Really?" she replied, "Why? He's trying to manipulate someone into loving him; it doesn't work like that."

"Yes but, he's so in love with this girl and his whole life he's been shunned. Why should he think she'd be any different? Imagine how it would feel to be so in love, so desperate for someone to love you back but you're terrified they'll hate you."

"It's awful; I'll give you that, but no matter the intentions, he was still wrong. And what kind of life would Christine have with Erik? The guy lives underground in a, frankly, creepy place. And he's a murderer. None of that can be healthy. Raoul can offer her everything the Phantom can't. He can give her a normal life."

"Maybe she didn't want a normal life. Maybe she wanted him. And he her."

As we debated, we moved closer to each other. Our faces getting nearer, eyes level, lips close. _So close. _I leaned closer still, lips only slightly apart. I could feel her breath, and even that smelled good. I was completely drawn into to her; her mouth, rich brown eyes, sweet breath and soft skin. We hovered, the world seemed to slow to a halt as I held my breath and thoughts of what to do next flew at me at the speed of light.

_What do I do next? What do I do now? Should I move? Should I wait for her to move? Would I look to forward if I moved first? Would she be mad if I moved first?I want to kiss her!_

My teenage hormones won over possible humiliation and rejection.

As I moved forwards (toward Bella) she moved backwards (away from me!) to my utter dismay.

We moved to opposite ends of the love seat and sat in an uncomfortable silence. Although that silence was comfortable compared to the silence that ensued after Emmett bounded down the stairs for drinks and said, "What's with the awkward silence? Did Bella look up your skirt or something, Ed?" he guffawed at his own joke and left Bella and I to our silence.

I realised one of us had better say something to break the silence soon, so I waited until Bella got the guts I lacked to speak up. After another five minutes, we both spoke at the same time.

"Bella I-"

"Edward-"

"You go first," I invited before she could. I never claimed not to be a coward.

"Okay." She stopped and thought. I stood, automatically, with her waiting for her to continue, "You're Christine." She blurted and ran to the door.

"I'm Christine?" I whispered faintly; not understanding her at all.

She had already flew out of the door though.

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_I was standing in a forest. Not Forks though, certainly not the forest I knew so well after years of playing explorer. There was dark, rich earth below my feet – which were barefoot - and the tree's seemed impossibly tall, almost as if they reached the sky. I couldn't even see the green of the treetops, understated rays of moonlight fought their way through branches and leaves and settled around me. Despite the lack of light, I did not feel threatened, scared or in any sort of danger. I felt only frustration. _

_I wondered at my frustration for a few seconds before I heard my name being called. No, not called, whispered, caressed. Out of my peripheral vision, I saw a flash of brown. I turned, still not alarmed, yet still frustrated and could see only trees. _

_This was the source of my frustration, I realised. I could not find who called to me. I was being teased. I saw a pale limb as it moved around the edge of the clearing. _

"_Edward!" There was no worry in her voice, only laughter. _

_Something clicked inside my brain, and I realised that I knew that voice. As if reading my mind, Bella walked slowly towards me. The hesitant way she did it made it appear that she was trying not to scare me, to move softly, like a person might a scared animal. _

_She stopped a few feet away from me, and the tree's seemed to part as the rays of the full moon fell upon her. She was beautiful. _

_Her brown locks tumbled around her face and some soft curls caught on her shoulder, her cheeks were slightly flushed and her eyes sparkled, almost like a child's. Her shimmering eyes held vulnerability, happiness, trust and love. She wore a white dress that wrapped around her waist and then flowed out around her. She looked like a little girl – her eyes showed her naïvety and all her innocence, yet her lush curves showed the opposite. _

_As I looked down at her, everything my mother taught was drowned out in a whirling maelstrom of teenage lust. I bent my head as she leaned towards me, I felt a sense of deja vu, like I had already lived this moment. Before I had a chance to think any more of my strange feeling, I felt a strange presence. _

_I felt the eyes lock on to Bella and I. They were not friendly and it was the intense stare of a predator. Suddenly the rich soil turned black, it spread over the earth, under my feet and continued forward, determined to make the ground black as the night. _

_Thick, grey clouds covered the moon and the trees seemed to gain height and what was once a safe place, became a terrifying one. Bella was still in my arms, and we were still being watched, except now the trees looked on with malice. _

_The black of the floor appeared to have crept up the large oak we were next to, and it seemed to twist, and bend painfully out of shape. It became haunting. _

_My instinct to protect Bella grew, and I pulled her to the right, desperate to get her to safety and away from the malicious feeling, yet there was no where to go. I was surrounded by the dark forest. _

"_Edward," I glanced down at Bella at the sound of my name, but quickly scanned the forest again, trying to think of a way to save us. Or at least save her. "Follow me." she urged and pulled me straight ahead. _

_It was then I noticed that she no longer looked like a nymph or fairy, but a dark Queen Persephone after she had eaten the forbidden food and tasted the pomegranate. Her dress had changed into a strapless floor length gown, and her eyes were the same colour. Except, they had no emotion in them, no recognition, just indifference. _

"_This way." Even her voice had become flat, as I dumbly let her lead me into the forest. Into the blackness and onto the path of the evil I had felt. I followed numbly behind her, feeling betrayed as she led my to my demise. _

I woke up with a start, reassuring myself that it was just a dream. _Only a dream_. My breathing finally steadied and I padded quietly to my en suite bathroom to splash some water on my face to try and relieve the heat and stark terror of my nightmare.

After Bella had ran from me, I went to my room and...well...sulked. More manly than childish though. Or so I told myself. I had laid in bed and struggled to sleep for a few hours when finally I drifted into my nightmare.

I laid back on my bed, and closed my eyes, hoping to find some sort of explanation for my dream. It didn't make sense. I trusted Bella completely, even though I had not known her long, I knew I would trust her with my life. I looked at the clock and saw it was almost time for the household to wake up.

I had finished putting on my shirt when Jasper walked into my room – without knocking. _Siblings_, I sighed mentally.

"You kiss her?" Jasper asked.

"What?!" I sputtered. How did he know?

"I'll take that as a no. And there's no need to feel all indignant; I'm your big brother, you can talk to me."

"Yeah, you can talk to me too Ed." Emmett paused just inside my room to think, then tactfully added, "Except about feelings and all that crap."

"So, you kiss her?"

"Thank you, but I am _not _talking to either of you about this."

Emmett glanced at Jasper and they shared a look.

"Didn't kiss her." they said together.

"Get out."

"Come on Ed! We're your brothers! Plus, we're not virgins, so you might want to take our advice."

I made a face as, _utterly_ unbidden, the thought of Jasper and Alice doing_ that _came to my mind. The same thing must've occurred to Emmett as he looked disgusted for a moment too.

"If mom finds out you screw-...had se-...made lo-..." Emmett paused and eventually settled on, "did _the deed_ with Alice, she'd be so pissed at you."

"What do you want Emmett?" Jasper sighed.

"I don't know yet, you'll have to owe me one."

I winced in sympathy for Jasper, once you 'owed Emmett one' you owed it him for life and basically became his own personal servant. This would usually last a few weeks – Emmett was almost as ostentatious as Rosalie – and my parents usually suspected something before long.

"Fine." he sighed, seeing no way out of it, then he turned back on me, "What happened Edward? Don't try to sneak out, it was obviously pretty intense if _Emmett_ could pick up on the romance vibes."

Emmett was offended enough to lightly punch Jasper, then agree with him.

I took a deep breath and released it in order to brace myself, "She ran."

Jasper gaped for a second, then stupidly repeated, "She_ ran_?"

Emmett collapsed in a heap on the floor, laughing violently. Jasper soon join in the hysterics and together they laughed at my failure. _Siblings_, I sighed mentally.

"Did it make a loud noise?"

I looked to Emmett in confusion.

"You know, her gaydar. I mean, it must've gone off pretty loud if she_ ran_ Edward!" This caused Emmett to laugh even harder at his own joke.

I waited patiently for them to shut up, and five minutes later I yelled at them.

"SHUT UP! This can't possibly be your definition of helping." I said scathingly.

They sighed and managed to pull themselves together.

"Talk to her I guess. She seems nice."

"Yeah." Emmett added, "Girls like to talk."

"Talk to her?" They had to be kidding. Did they not realised how awkward it would be? How embarrassing?

"Yeah. We've got to get ready for school."

"Wait," Emmett said as he was about to back out of the door, "you said she falls a lot?"

"Yeah." Where was he going with this?

"Pick her up! Or better yet – stop her falling in the first place. Save her."

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"We need to talk." _God_, I thought, _I just said the most clichéd line ever, and didn't even mean it in _that _way. You moron Edward. _

Bella jumped as I whispered the words in her ear. It was lunchtime, and the first chance I had to properly talk to her as she had been avoiding me for most of the day. I had devised a plan to sneak up behind her, and trap her. This – pleasantly – included me having to lean into her and speak directly into her ear. She used strawberry shampoo.

"We don't. I'm absolutely fine not talking. So lets do that." she said cheerfully.

I was jolted back into reality, from the sweet scent of her hair and the fantasies they aroused...erm, brought, at her reply.

I turned her gently to face me.

"Talk to me Bella, please." I pleaded with her as I looked deep into her eyes.

Why did I crave her presence so much? Why did the thought of talking to her thrill me, and the knowledge that she avoided me tear me up inside?

I had no answers.

"We do not need to talk!"

"We do."

"We do not."

"Yes, we do!" by this point, both of us were becoming very frustrated.

"DO NOT!" Bella yelled and then ran. Again.

_See?! She doesn't want to talk you Edward. She doesn't want you. Everytime you get nearer she runs. RUNS! _An evil voice whispered inside my head.

_Edward, pull yoursef together! You're about two seconds away from breaking down in front of everyone. _I listened to the kinder voice's advice. _And for the love of- _Follow her_ you idiot!_

I did as I was told and raced after Bella. I saw she was about to escape into one of the buildings and out of the slightly damp patch of grass I had followed her to. _'Followed her to'? That sounds creepy, what are you, her stalker? _If she went inside then all would be lost. How could I talk to her with nasally Newton nearby? I couldn't. _Keep her outside!_

I have no idea what possessed me to do what I did next.

I tackled her.

Seriously. I tackled her like one of those rugby games Emmett likes to watch.

"Are you okay?" I asked, horrified at my actions. We were lying on the grass, and the way I tackled her meant I was lying on her back. I realised I was probably hurting her more, so rolled off her, then I rolled onto my side. Bella did the same and avoided my eyes as she tried to regain her breath. She didn't seem too winded though. I guess I hadn't hit her as hard as I thought.

"I'm fine. I think I have whiplash though."

"Sorry, Bella. I-"

"Don't worry about it Edward," she cut me off, "I guess you really wanted to speak to me, huh?"

"Yeah, but, there were better ways for me to do that without _tackling_ you!"

I really hated myself sometimes.

"No. It's fine. I just...I" She paused. "I'm sorry I ran from you last night, and I should've faced up to you today instead of running. It's just, I got...scared," she said 'scared' with some surprise, as if she wasn't used to the feeling, "this is all really new to me."

"It's new to me also." I replied quietly.

"Really?" Bella queried with some disbelief. Was that good or bad? Didn't she believe that I hadn't had much interaction with girls? Wasn't my lack of experience evident from my tackle? I cringed internally at the word._ Tackle._

"Anyway, I'm not used to this. And I don't think it would be a good idea."

"A good idea?" I echoed.

She made me happy. I had come to recognise the feeling I got when I was near her; happiness, elation maybe. I had felt these feelings before, but only with my family. Only whilst watching their joy and interacting with them. And never like this. Never of this...magnitude.

"Yes. I'm sorry."

I laid with my back on the grass thinking about her words as she got up and walked away. Walked away from me.

Not even my nightmare Bella has deprived me of the chance to be with her. It seemed cruel that she would pull such joy from me, with no explanation, and it seemed both cruel and unjust that one person should hold that power over me. Hold my very happiness in their hands. Their heart.

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Sorry it was so late. You all have a ticket to kick me as hard as you like. I started off meaning to go in one direction with this chapter, but went in a different one, and that caused the delay. My infinite apologies, and I will try harder to get a new one out faster.

**There's pictures and links on my profile, including a tackle similar to what Edward did to Bella (and, no, I have no idea why he did that any more than he does – it was very spur of the moment) so look there for it. **

Thank you for reading, and having more patience than I could ever have for keeping with this story.


	9. Conversations, Crossed wires & Capulets

**Disclaimer:** I do not own Twilight. Etc.

**Chapter Song: **_Romeo and Juliet _by the _Dire Straights _

_Mr Banner's 'phrases' were inspired and helped by and Amazon thread I came across. The link is on my profile._

**Chapter Eight:**

Conversations, crossed wires and Capulets 

It hurt me more than I would liked to admit. Walking away from Edward.

I tried to force myself not to look back. Fight the feeling to see the look on his face, to see the emotions in his eyes. My control was ripped from me and I lost my internal battle and turned to find his green depths filled with conflicting emotions.

Anger? Definitely, I had felt that one a time or two before. Hurt? Yes, I didn't know the feeling well, but I had come across it before. Was that, regret? Loss? Hope? _Why? _I asked myself. No answers came to me as I carried on with my school day – avoiding Edward – and walked home in silence.

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"Jake, when I'm with him, I get the most curious feelings."

I looked at my pet briefly and continued, "My stomach starts to feel funny, and it feels like there are millions of butterflies floating around, yet I don't feel nervous near him at all; the opposite in fact. I feel so relaxed and calm, and I just want to pour my heart out to him and tell him everything about me. I want him to do the same."

I hesitated for a moment, looked around and carried on with my confession once more, "When we're near each other, I get this... urge to touch him. A violent need. It's satisfied with just a graze of his skin, or a sigh of his breath fluttering over me, yet it always wants more. How can something feel satisfied yet needy at the same time?! It's a total contradiction and makes no sense what-so-ever."

I looked into Jake's eyes and found no answers. Damn.

I started at a knock on my front door. I opened it without thinking of who it could be, or maybe I hoped it _was _him. Now my own emotions were started to confuse me. Was there no piece of my mind to not be invaded by Edward?! Why was every other thought about him?! Why could I trace each intricate feeling all back to him?! Why did my heart flip at the thought of him, my eyes ache at the sight of him, my body tingle with thoughts of his, my hands beg to be encased in his? My senses were alight, and he was the match that started the inferno.

I came back to my senses (what were those again?) and found Alice repeating my name.

"Is it nice that little world of yours?" I thought of my other 'little world', the dead black trees and dark sky that stretched ominously for eternity and shuddered. It was definitely _not _nice.

"Not particularly. How are you?"

"I'm good, thanks." Alice saved me from what could have been an awkward situation – it would have been proper etiquette to invite her in. Luckily, Alice didn't seem an etiquette type, yet she owned such grace for her tiny form. "Can I come in? It's _freezing_ out here."

"Oh, sure sorry. Come on in."

She thanked me and stepped through the door and into my living room. It was very spacious, with one bright red wall which boasted a real, roaring fire place complete with burning wood, above it was a large, flat TV screen with various wires leading to various boxes used for various things. (cable and dvd players and so on) The other three walls were a cream colour, the red and open fire made them look warm. The cream walls held some art work, pictures of my mother and I - recently taken with a plain, nondescript background. A large, white-cream corner sofa rested against the wall, not too far from the fire. I didn't need warmth to keep me 'alive' but the heat was a welcome sensation occasionally. It wasn't a cluttered space, a few ornaments on the fire's mantle, but it still felt cosy and cottage like.

"It's gorgeous!" Alice squealed. She threw herself onto my couch and turned back to me. "I thought we could hang out for a while. Emmett and Rose are _'studying' _somewhere, Jasper's at some after school club and Edward's sulking like a kid who can't get candy. I thought this would be a good time to work on our friendship." She beamed.

All I could manage was a feeble, "Okay." I mean, what do you say to that? I sat next to Alice, feeling slightly unsure of the night I had ahead of me.

Wait, Edward was sulking? Because of me? I erased the thought and turned back to Alice.

"Make yourself at home, what would you like to do?"

"I have a few ideas. To begin with, we call for pizza."

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Thirty minutes later, Alice and I were sat in front of my TV and warm fire eating pizza, watching _Dirty Dancing,_ laughing and talking like old friends. Any anxiety had been soothed by her infectious smile and presence.

Despite the age difference (her 17, me 100) and living so far apart (different worlds) we both knew most of the lines. Somehow I became Baby and she became Johnny. The highlights were the lines, "'I carried a watermelon.'" and, "'Nobody puts Baby in the corner!'"

"Wouldn't you just love to have Patrick Swayze dance like _that _with you?" Alice questioned me around a bite of pizza.

"That depends, Patrick today, or Patrick twenty years ago? The answer changes significantly."

Alice laughed and replied, "Twenty years ago."

"Then yes Alice, I would _love _to have Patrick Swayze dirty dance with me twenty years ago."

The movie came to a close, and Alice declared the next activity on the agenda.

"20 questions." She announced.

"What about it?"

"We're going to play it silly."

I started to protest – could I really be truthful in my answers? I hadn't been told _not _to tell anyone about myself. Humans have a habit of declaring people crazy though – and Alice cut me off.

"It's the best way to get to know each other! Please? Pretty, gorgeous please with ice cream and a cherry on top?"

_Who could say no that? _

"Fine," I sighed, "twenty questions it is."

I turned sharply as Alice let a out a high-pitched squeal.

"What?! What is it?!" I couldn't see any immediate danger, so why was she squealing?

"Haven't you ever been so happy you just have to let it out somehow? Because it feels like you're going to burst?"

"Erm, no." I didn't understand at all. A human thing? Or an Alice thing?

"Did that count as question one?"

"Fine, I'll give you that one. Your turn."

I thought for a second. "What's up with you and Jasper?"

"Look, we're not actually_ related_-"

"Alice. Stop. I meant, are you _in love_ with Jasper. I don't care how you're related, besides, the school gossip already explained the situation."

"You're a strange one aren't you Bella?"

"I guess," I laughed, more strange than she realised, "You never answered the question though."

"Yes. I am absolutely, totally, completely in love with Jasper. I know we're young, but I also know that this is the real thing. _True_ love. You'd think people would be happy we'd found each other at such a young age – now we have the rest of our lives together – but everyone just looks at us sceptically, and says we're at that 'rebellious' or 'curious' age and that it's just a phase. It's not._ It's forever._"

I heard and felt her sincerity when she said the last two words. She was in love, and I believed she'd be in love forever, just like she said. Alice seemed one to know her own mind. It was more than that though, it was the way she said Jasper's name, with wonder and love and awe – awe that she had found her soul mate. Her eyes lit up as she spoke about him, and the grey depths shone with admiration and more love.

"Okay, my turn again. Question two; Tell me something about yourself no one else knows."

"I don't know if I'm capable of emotion." I mentally slapped myself. Why would I say that? _Why didn't I think before I opened my mouth! Hey Bella, your village called, they want their idiot back -time to go home! _I was furious with myself. I had just said aloud a forbidden thought that I tried never to let myself dwell on.

"Oh Bella. Why would you think that?"

Again, my mouth seemed to go before my brain processed the words. "I never feel extreme emotion. I'm happy or sad. Not devastated, or elated, it's like I'm made from stone. No feelings get in, and none get out."

Jake let out a low warning growl as Alice jumped at and squeezed me.

"Bella."

It was strange. Instead of giving words that I would ignore, thinking she was just trying to be kind. She just stayed there and hugged me. It was strange. I wasn't a touchy-feely person, and neither was my mother. Perhaps a result of never having anyone to actually touch us, we were always just a little bit distant and if anyone else but Alice had thrown their arms around me, I would've threw them across the room. _Please_ stay out of my dance space.

Then it turned from comforting to uncomfortable.

"Erm, Alice. You can stop the hugging now. My question." She let go and resumed her seat as I grabbed another bite of pizza.

"Okay, go for it."

"Tell me more about your family."

"My family? My family are insane." She said the last line with fondness.

"Tell me anyway. I bet there's some good anecdotes in there."

"Well, first off you have Carlisle. He's the head of the family and the glue that binds us together. He stops our arguments and makes the peace. He's also a doctor. Next you have our mother, Esme. Esme is a sucker for all things that need rescuing. She started off a housewife, but then began to take all sorts of injured and stray animals in. She volunteers for one of those animal rescue places now. She's a born carer." She took s slight pause then continued to fascinate me with her family, "Emmett is the eldest – and biggest - he's in college this year. He's the joker and the protector of the family all rolled into one. He got in trouble when I was six for hitting Mike Newton who pulled my hair and said I was weird. He's a huge teddy bear."

She paused and took a bite of pizza. "Emmett's head over heels for Rosalie Hale, who, outwardly, seems like an ice queen. She's had a hard life though, and will fight to the death to protect her family – us. She rarely speaks to her parents and is an only child."

"Born second was Jasper." Her voice changed in emotion. "He's quiet, controlled and highly emotional. He's passionate about everything he does, especially his music. He plays the guitar and he's phenomenal at it." She caught herself, and moved on.

"After that is Edward, who is also quiet, but in a different way. He holds his emotions in. He reminds me of a poker player. Everything he does seems to be strategic, everything has a purpose and he has a fantastic poker face. You never know what he's feeling, not really. He keeps all his cards close to his chest. But when you do get to know him - wow. He's my confidant, and I'm his. It's hard to get to know Edward, but it's well worth trying."

"Wow. And what about you?"

"Ah, that's another question. I'll tell you about me some other time. My question now." She took another slice of pizza and thought for a moment.

"I am about to ask you a serious question and expect you to be honest with me. Would you rather...kiss Simon Cowell or lick someone's shoe."

"What?" I laughed, "Where did you even get that?!"

"Answer the question Bella."

The night carried on like that, us asking the other stupid questions which we spent more time laughing over than answering. It was a great night.

&X&X&X&X&X&X&X&X&X&X&X&X&X&X&

I looked at the clock the next morning and decided I'd better get ready for school. _Where I'd see Edward again._ The thought instantly sent the butterflies back to my stomach.

I saw him during English, yet we weren't close enough to speak to each other.

"Romeo and Juliet." Our teacher, Miss Frost stated. "Can anyone tell me what it's about?"

A few hands raised, mine included.

"Bella, can you tell me?"

"It's a play, set in Verona, Italy, and is about 'two star-crossed lovers' – their relationship is set in the stars, it's destiny or fate. There are two households. The Capulet's -family of Juliet – and the Montague's - family of Romeo. These families are practically at war with each other. Romeo and Juliet fall in forbidden love, to escape a marriage set up by her parents, Juliet takes a potion that makes her appear as if she is sleeping, Romeo didn't find out about this – miscommunication – and he sees Juliet looking dead and kills himself. Juliet then wakes up and finds her love dead and kills herself for real. _'For never was a story of more woe / Than this of Juliet and her Romeo'_."

"Very good Bella. Can anyone tell me what the themes are? Yes, Edward."

"The themes are love, fate and chance. There's also another slight theme of light and dark. For example, Romeo often refers to Juliet as his sun."

"Also very good Edward. Anything else? Any other points?"

I spoke again. I could never keep my mouth shut when I came across a piece of literature, and it was nice to finally have someone other than my mother to talk about it to.

"I think they seem quite fickle."

"How so Bella?" Miss Frost just asked me my viewpoint, not saying I was right or wrong – I could tell I would enjoy my English lessons while I was in her class.

"Well, at the beginning, Romeo's depressed because a girl called Rosaline doesn't love him. Lady Capulet is trying to convince Juliet that Paris would be a good choice for her-" I couldn't continue with my sentence because I was cut off; by Edward.

"They had never encountered one another before. Romeo was into Rosaline, but she was forgotten as soon as he saw Juliet. She stole his heart with one glance."

"Another point of mine I was going to include before being _very rudely interrupted_, was the timing. They fall in love, get married, have sex and die in a matter of days! How could they love each other to such an extent after only, what, six days? You don't think that's _slightly_ fickle?"

"Love." he replied.

"Care to elaborate, Edward?" Miss Frost watched on slightly amused, most of the class watched on bewildered at our heated debate.

"Of course. It's love at first sight, and their love gets more and more intense each day – each minute – they're with each other. There were other interests before, but after they see each other, nothing else matters but the other."

"They're teenagers. You really think two people so young can fully understand that sort of love? They aren't emotionally equipped to deal with such complex emotions like true love at that age. I'm not selling it."

Edward looked at me with some confusion before replying, "I think you mean you're 'not buying it'." I cringed at my mistake and made a mental note. _Don't try to fit in using teenage slang or phrases. It makes you look like an ass. _

"Anyway, I think that teenagers are, in some ways, _better_ quipped to deal with those emotions. Teenagers are volatile and passionate. I'll give you that the majority – say 98% - of the teenagers in this school aren't actually in true love – not the forever 'til death do us part' sort of love, yet you can't undermine what they feel. They probably are in love, except they have intensity, whereas adults have experience and so love in a different, more permanent way. Both are forms of love: just different types of love."

"No." I thought of Alice when she spoke about Jasper, "I'll give you _98%. _But No. I don't think I believe that. About them being in love." I managed to sooth my temper enough to keep my voice steady as I spoke.

"Well that doesn't matter, seeing as it's not a belief, it's a _fact!_" Edward wasn't so in control of his temper. _If he's not going to try and be mature about this, then why should I?_

"Was it proven?" I raised my voice, so it wasn't quite yell, but still loud.

"No, it's just a life fact!" Edward matched my tone and raised it. I raised mine even more and yelled, "What would you know about life?! You're only seventeen for the love of-"

"Enough! Both of you. We_ were _talking about Romeo and Juliet." Miss frost decided to play referee and called louder than both of us had. A silence spread around the classroom. It was broken by Jessica Stanley's, "Well I_ definantly _wouldn't kill myself over a guy. Pathetic much?"

&X&X&X&X&X&X&X&X&X&X&X&X

The dreaded lunch hour came again and I went and queued in the line to get food, getting enough for two people. I strode back out of the hall and to the safety of Mr Banner's classroom, where the man in question was asleep at his desk. I rolled my eyes.

"Want some food?" I called to him as I took a seat at a table in the front of the class. His head came up and he nodded furiously.

"Your wife still mad at you?" I asked with some sympathy. Then I remembered he deserved, and some of the sympathy left.

"Yes!_ And _she won't even tell me what I've done."

What he'd done (I figured it out from a previous conversation) was forget their anniversary, then in the ensuing argument, insulted her mother and sister. Even worse, he expected it all to be okay the next day. He was still paying over a week later.

The door opened and framed Edward with a tray of food balanced in one hand. We stared at each other until Mr Banner coughed 'awkward' and retreated back to his desk. Edward moved towards the table I was sitting at and politeness dictated that I move my bag from the stool next to me for him to sit on. My mouth went dry (and the butterflies came back – I was thinking of naming them they were around so often now) as he bent slightly to put his bag on the floor and sit next to me. I noted that he smelt good, sweet almost and I found myself wanting to get nearer to him and inhale. Instead I took a deep breath through my nose and committed his scent to memory. Then mentally slapped myself, _now I was going round __**smelling**__ people! What the hell is wrong with you Bella?_

I distracted myself by not looking at him – if I saw him, I'd want to look longer – and taking a bite from the apple on my tray and staring forward at a poster of Albert Einstein that had him sticking his tongue out with a caption that read, 'Science can be fun!'.

"I looked for you earlier, Alice said you might be in here."

"Mm"

The Einstein poster wasn't distracting me any more, so I 'extended' my hearing to down the corridor slightly when I overheard something strange, "Well, I'd screw her, put it that way." followed by laughter. I'd also carried on listening to Edward (multi-tasking!) and came fully back to the conversation confused.

"I'm sorry if I was a little to...aggressive earlier, but I still stand by what I said. Though I admit I was wrong to-"

"Edward. I really don't care. You yelled, I yelled. I'm over it. However, I'd be very grateful if you'd tell me how you screw a person!"

Edward's green eyes had gone large and his mouth slowly dropped open before me. The voice I heard wasn't Edward's though, it was Mr Banner's.

"Bella, I wouldn't usually explain this to students – your parents should have done that – but I like you, so I'll tell you. When a man and a woman love each other very much, he decides he wants to have the gift between her thighs and insert the burning sword of his manhood into the soft, velvety flesh of her womanhood..."

I turned to Edward and saw a look of pained horror on his face that I'm sure would mirror my own. Mr Banner continued on, oblivious as Edward took my hand and led me out of the classroom. I however was still mentally slapping myself for asking such a thing, and contemplating how I would be able to face Mr Banner next period after hearing him say the phrase, 'Moist honey pot'.

Cool air hit me and I saw that Edward had brought me to his car and was unlocking his silver Volvo. He bowed his head and indicated for me to climb in. I did, readying my apology.

"Edward, I am _so, so _sorry." I whispered with mortification, it was my turn to hang my head – in shame. It was bad enough that I'd brought that upon _myself_, but to have Edward be there was just...awful! "I didn't think he was going to-. That he would-. I'm _sorry_."

He was silent for so long, I looked up to check he wasn't unbelievably angry and trying to reign in his emotions. Edward was shaking. Not with rage as I would've first guessed, but with laughter! He was laughing!

"Edward!" he just laughed harder at my chastising voice. I punched him lightly in the arm. I guess it wasn't light enough as he stopped laughing and cradled it after saying "Ow".

"Bella, that really hurt!"

"Sorry! I guess I didn't realise my own strength." I tried to cover lamely.

"No problem – it didn't hurt that much anyway."

"What? How could it not hurt? And didn't you just say-"

"You have to admit, that scene back there was pretty funny. Some how I never pictured Mr Banner spewing cheesy romance novel phrases – and to a student!" He laughed some more, and I joined in, grudgingly. It was a _little bit_ funny, I suppose. After the humiliation wore off, obviously.

Then something struck me. "Wait, how do you know they were 'romance novel phrases'?" The mental image of Edward hiding a romance book with a car magazine made me laugh harder.

"It's not like that!"

"Really? Come on Edward,_ confess_. I promise it won't leave this car."

"Fine," he sighed in defeat. "A while back, I didn't have anything to read – Forks library is small and it's a long drive to the nearest Borders, so I asked Alice to lend me one of her books."

I restrained my laughter. "Which one?"

He didn't answer.

"Okay, fine. You don't have to tell me until you want to, okay?"

"Deal."

We sat in a comfortable silenced for a while, before Edward asked, "You want to ditch Biology?"

"Ditch?"

"Yeah. You know, skip it? You have to decide, because we have to be there in five minutes. I'm just not sure I can look at him without remembering, 'his hard rod as they move to a rhythm as old a time'. Where did he even _get_ that one from?

We both burst into fits of laughter again, and decided to come up with some of the worst phrases in books. We did 'ditch' science, and had lots of fun doing so. It was like a weird sort of bonding experience, like the one I had with Alice last night, but more...I dunno, intense I suppose.

It was then I realised I liked Edward more than was healthy for us both.

&X&X&X&X&X&X&X&X&X&X&X&X&X&X&

School ended swiftly, I gave Jake some dog food (I had dropped by a shop on my way home from school) did some homework, read, showered and finally went to lay on my bed and think for a while.

Jake came and laid beside me, a comforting presence. During the long nights, when TV and books were no consolation, he soothed me and made me feel less homesick. Though it wasn't really the home I was missing, it was the person in it. After being around someone consistently for a hundred years, you miss them a lot. More so when it's your mother, and the only other person in your life.

I was happy to be in Forks, to play human, but the ugly reality was I wasn't. I wasn't human, but I wasn't anything else either. Then throw in the fact I'm a walking corpse, half dead, half alive and you've got yourself a real identity crisis. Was that what this whole thing was? Me being insecure and wondering who I was?

My thoughts shifted to Edward, and what he was doing at that minute. Then they delved to somewhere I didn't want them to go – how I felt about Edward. For some reason, I cared for him. His happiness mattered to me. I was shaken from further dangerous thoughts as Jake's low growling, and I realised there was a slight tapping on the windows of my French doors.

I opened them and leaned over the balcony, only to have a pebble hit me in the head. "Ouch! Damn it!"

I heard a muffled curse from below.

"Who are you?" I demanded, "Because you have just hit me and I am fully capable of throwing a punch!" That was a lie, I didn't know how to throw a punch any more than I knew how to hot wire a car.

"I know, you hit me earlier." Edward. I'd know that voice anywhere. I giggled. _Giggled. Like a twelve year old girl. _

"I do have a front door you know?"

"Yeah, but I, ah..."

He cleared his throat and began to speak.

"'But soft! What light through yonder window breaks?  
It is the East, and Juliet is the sun!  
Arise, fair sun, and kill the envious moon  
Who is already sick and pale with grief'"

"Act two, scene two." I breathed. The balcony scene from _Romeo and Juliet_. He was quoting Shakespeare to me! I assumed his break was my cue and took it.

"'Ay me!'"

He laughed softly and continued.

"'She speaks.  
O, speak again, bright angel, for thou art  
As glorious to this night, being o'er my head,  
As is a winged messenger of heaven  
Unto the white-upturned wond'ring eyes  
Of mortals that fall back to gaze on him  
When he bestrides the lazy puffing clouds  
And sails upon the bosom of the air.'"

"Should I continue Romeo? Because we both know how this ends."

"Endings can be re-written fair Juliet."

"That was beautiful Edward. I can't believe you know _Romeo and Juliet_ well enough to quote it so perfectly."

He didn't reply, instead he said, "I don't think you're the sun Bella. You're more like the moon. Romeo was wrong, the moon's better than the sun."

My breath caught.

"Why? Why is it better? Isn't the sun safer?"

"I might tell you someday Juliet."

And then he was gone. Leaving me bewildered and with a warm, fuzzy feeling in my stomach.

Z&Z&Z&Z&Z&Z&Z&Z&Z&Z&Z&Z&Z&Z

A/n – And that's it for this chapter. They have pet names! Lol

The link to the Amazon forum I mentioned at the beginning of this chapter is on my profile, most of the phrases are from the first few pages of the thread and some are very funny.

There's also a link to the Act Two, Scene Two (Balcony scene) I got the quotes from, if you want to take a look at that. It even explains some of the strange/old words used in the scene.

Thank you for reading, it'd be great if you reviewed and let me know you like it! Plus, it's quicker than the last chapter!

-Melissa


	10. Wrinkles, blood and messy emotions

**Chapter Nine:**

Wrinkles, Blood and messy emotions.

_Four weeks later...._

Bella came through the door as she always did. In the past four weeks she had become a regular member of the household, eating with us regularly (after my mother discovered her diet mainly consisted of pop-tarts and hot pockets) and she now felt confident enough to just push open the door and make herself at home. Today she threw herself on the sofa opposite me. We talked often, and she had even convinced me to play for her one day. I smiled, remembering the day with fondness.

"_So, I've never heard you play this here piano." Bella said as we passed it one day._

"_No Bella. I'm not some concert pianist, and I'll probably screw up with you here; I like to play on my own."_

_  
"Oh, pleeeeease?" she begged. Bella stretched across my piano._

"_Come on. You can play and I'll lie here and be pretty." she grinned. _I love it when she smiles_, I thought._ It lights her whole face up. _Whenever she smiled_ at _me, my heart did a 360 in my chest. Which just didn't seem healthy._

_I shook my head again. I'd probably get nervous with her listening, maybe even standing behind me, pressing slightly against me, and then I would hit the wrong note and it would sound awful and I would look like an ass. _

_Bella slid off the piano and stalked her way over to me and placed her hands on either side of my face and looked directly into my eyes._

"_Edward, I want to hear you play. If I wanted to see a 'concert pianist' then I would've gotten tickets to a show, wouldn't I? I want to listen to you. I'm sure you very talented." _ _she threw in a smile and I was a goner. _

_We sat together on the bench, near but not close enough to touch. Never close enough to touch. _

_I noticed that Bella often avoided contact with people. Yet all I ever wanted to do was touch her. I contented myself with long glances and sly brushes against her; small unnoticeable things like a silky strand of brown hair floating over my hand as she moved past me or a brush of cloth-covered leg. I had no idea what was wrong with me. _

_Obviously it was lust; I'd figured out that much on my own. But who knew lust was this...powerful? Possessive? It seemed to take root in my body and spread like a cancer infecting every pore of my body until even her hair invoked a reaction from me. There had to be some sort of name for that, right? _

_In the end, she won and I played for her. It was Esme's favourite song, and when I turned back to her I thought she might cry for a second. _Was I really that bad? _I wondered. I must've said it aloud, because she turned to me, turned the full force of those amazing dark eyes toward me and looked at me very seriously – which I had come to realise was a rarity for Bella, she was an easy person always laughing._

"_Edward. That was-. It... It was amazing. You are the most talented musician I know."_

"_You know a lot of musicians then?" I joked. It was all a façade. My music – especially my own pieces – were extremely personal and I was self concious about it I suppose. Letting someone else listen to my own music was like opening my heart and showing them what lay there. Waiting and allowing them to examine each intricate emotion and hope that they didn't judge to harshly. Esme's song (for lack of a better title) was a sweet melody, showcasing the love my family had for their partners and my elation at them having found people they could love so much._

"_You really like it?" I asked tentatively._

"_Edward!" she exclaimed, exasperated, "I said it was amazing and it was. It was beautiful."_

"_Would...would. Would you like to hear another one? It's very different," I warned, "No one else has heard it before – I couldn't play it for them."_

_The piece I was referring to was the dark emotions that threatened to consume me. Emotions like the jealousy that they had such loved ones, and the self hatred that I would be so petty and jealous. _

_The beauty beside me nodded mutely and I placed my fingers across the keys and become lost in my feelings and the world that I had created for myself to retreat to. My eyes closed without concious thought as the notes rang out. This was the opposite of the last song I had played, it was dark and each note was heavy, echoing the heaviness of my heart. It was a monstrous thing, yet I couldn't deny it had it's own...charm. _

_I finished and kept my head down, awaiting her judgement. _

"_I think I'm speechless – and I'm never speechless. I loved it." she continued to gush and praise me, and my ego fell a little bit in love with her. Like me._

I was jolted back to the present hearing Bella's voice.

"I'd love to have wrinkles."

_This girl said the oddest things._ I chuckled and replied, "You're seventeen, you have plenty of time for wrinkles."

An odd look passed over her face, so I changed the subject. I didn't want her to be sad.

"Where did that question come from anyway?"

"Extreme Makeover." She tilted her head towards the TV, which indeed, had Extreme Makeover on and was currently showing the graphic surgery of an ageing woman who wasn't even that old.

"I don't understand. Well, I do, evidently their vanity has got the best of them and they feel the need to change their bodies is such a dramatic and painful way. But I think that may reflect more on today's culture. _Anyway_, wrinkles are great. Take laugh lines for example, I would love those. A testament to how much you've laughed all those past years."

"What if you haven't laughed?" I interrupted.

"Then, people should notice that you have none and try to make you laugh."

I chuckled and wondered how she could seem so worldly and smart, yet so naïve and innocent at the same time. We fell into a comfortable silence. Sitting in silence with Bella was often more interesting than actually talking to some other people. She expressed herself not only through her powerful words and strong opinions, but through her posture and the habits she had.

Bella had folded her legs under her and leant forward with an intense look of concentration on her face as she watched the 'unveiling'. It gave me a good chance to study the features I seemed to have memorized without meaning to. She was twice as fascinating to watch as any TV show, I thought as her brow furrowed.

"Why do you watch Extreme makeover anyway?"

"I was thinking about becoming a surgeon one day."

"So you watch it for the surgery? Tell the truth Edward, I know when you're lying."

I dropped my voice to a whisper and beckoned her closer.

"I...I have. I have a small phobia. Of blood."

Bella's eyes widened, "So _why the hell_ would you want to be a surgeon?"

_How did she know _exactly _which questions I didn't want to answer?_

"My dad. He's a doctor-"

"I know. I also know your dad is super sweet, he wouldn't want you to become a doctor or surgeon to please him. Yet you persist? Are you some kind of masochist? Do mental illnesses run in your family? Answer truthfully or I can't diagnose you."

I smiled despite myself.

"I know he wouldn't push me, but it would make him exceptionally proud. And, I don't really know what I want to do with my life."

"You're seventeen, Edward, you've got plenty of time to think about what you want to do." she echoed my earlier statement.

"Not really. I'm off to college next year, I need to decide some sort of path."

"Well, Jasper's going this year, right? What does he want to do? And what about Alice?"

"Jasper has Alice, so he doesn't really care what happens to him, but my parents sat down with him and he's decided to pursue his love of writing. And Alice is certain she's going to be a CEO some day, and is going to study business. She's very interested in advertisement, which makes sense I suppose - she can be _very_ persuasive."

"Well, I'm sure you'll find something." she consoled, "And we can look into anything you're interested in. But first, you never did say why you watch Extreme makeover."

I smiled and explained that I hoped seeing the blood and the process of surgery on TV would perhaps prepare me and help me fight my phobia.

"It's not really bad. I can just about watch it on TV, but if I see blood I get...erm, woozy." And emotional rock she is, Bella laughed.

"I'm sorry, but I fail to see how my fear is funny in any way." I said this despite the fact I was on the verge of laughing also. Hearing such a carefree noise and seeing her writhing about on the sofa in laughter was making me laugh.

"You have to admit, it_ is_ funny. Just a little."

We were still laughing like children about other, equally stupid things ten minutes later when my mother walked in with some shopping, looked at us and shook her head with a faint smile saying, "I don't think I want to know."

"Any more bags you want a hand with Esme?" Bella asked. She only called them Mr and Mrs Cullen in public any more.

X&X&X&X&X&X&X&X&X&X&X&X&X&X

She was a button. A big, red, shiny button. With a '_**DO NOT TOUCH'**_ sign above her, which of course, only made me want to press the button more. At least that's what I told myself as I laid awake in my bed, unable to sleep for thinking about the look of pure delight and awe on her face as we had recited Romeo & Juliet together, how she seemed so proud when I played for her. Simply when she smiled. She was a button to me; an infatuation, a crush and nothing more. Definitely nothing more meaningful.

So why couldn't I sleep because of her?

Eventually I was pushed by exhaustion into a light, fitful sleep.

And along came another dream. Yes, _another _dream. I was having them frequently now, almost every night – and always about her.

Often it was the same as the first, Bella leading me to my demise, some nights – like tonight – they changed. They became more...personal.

Sometimes Alice would 'steal' Bella for the night for a sleepover, Rose even joined in sometimes now, and I would see a flash of her shoulder in her large, old t-shirt, a snippet of her thigh in the well-worn shorts – hey, I'm a teenage boy, it doesn't take much. Also, those innocent, minute gestures on her behalf just made everything more...well, sexy. She seemed so unaware of my presence sometimes, just oblivious to me which was equal parts frustrating and endearing, yet with any other girl I would be mad.

That's why tonight's dream featured Bella in a barely-there outfit doing some very indecent things. And also why my sticky sheets needed changing. _Being a teenager sucks, _I thought, that however, led me down another train of thought and back to my dream – and the cause of me having to do my own laundry a week before laundry day.

&X&X&X&X&X&X&X&X&X&X&X&X&X&X

In true Forks fashion, it was raining. Pouring actually. School had finished and I was riding to school alone. Alice and Jasper took her car at my request – I wanted to be alone for a while. _That is such a lie, you don't want to be alone, you just don't want to be with anyone but Bella. _ My mind was tormenting me. Taunting me. I found reflections of her in everything, and if there wasn't a similarity, then my mind would point out an obvious difference. My treacherous head wasn't my own any more. One of it's favourite taunts was that soon my heart would be invaded in a fashion far more brutal than the war I fought in my head.

Thoughts of her had sneaked in, quietly like assassins. Then more came, and more and then before I knew it, my head had been infested with no nook to myself.

I sped up, and hoped the speed would shut off my brain for a few precious seconds. I opened the window a crack for the same reason, hoping the air and furious droplets of water that fought their way through would startle some sense into me. I drove fast through a huge puddle. There had been a wide, shallow hole in that spot for years. I remembered it well because my siblings and I jumped in whenever we got the chance. I also knew it was that puddle because I heard a feminine scream a second after my tires hit it.

I was in such a bad mood, I thought about driving off, but I knew I would feel guilty later if I did because my parents had raised me better than to drive off when I had done an injustice to someone.

"I'm sorry, I didn't realise that any one would walk on a day like this; it's wet even by Forks' standards." I stopped as soon as I saw a drenched Bella glaring at me.

"What _the hell_, Edward?!"

"Why are you walking?"

"I'm saving the environment," she answered. I raised an eyebrow and waited, "And I don't know how to drive." she finished.

"Seriously?" I gaped.

"I've never needed to know."

Another mystery for me to sort through. More ammunition for the war of my sanity versus my own mind. _Was that the definition of crazy?_ I wondered. _Fighting yourself and losing._ Bella coughed and brought me out of my trance.

"Sorry, I, erm, wandered off there I guess. Do you want a ride?"

_Please say yes. Please say yes. Please say yes. Please say yes. _

"No, I want to walk." _Damn._

"You can't walk; you'll catch your death! It's raining and freezing." she looked at me oddly, with that hurt look in her eyes. The almost confused one that made her look so vulnerable, I just wanted to catch her in my arms and hold her till it went away. _ You are such a loser._ See? No rest from my own mind.

"I'm fine Edward. Besides, I wouldn't want to get your seat wet."

"Bella, you're soaking and it's pouring."

"It's not."

"It is!"

"IT'S NOT!" she roared, and right on cue, a huge hailstone hit her in the right eye.

"_Christ_ that hurt! What _was_ that?" She put a hand protectively over her injured eye. It was awful seeing her hurt, but hilarious to see her grumpy face look up to the sky reprovingly.

"Bella get in the car!" I laughed as the heavens opened and more hail poured.

"Ow! God these hurt!" she laughed back and ran around to the passengers side and jumped in.

We both fell into each other in fits of laughter for absolutely no reason. Amazingly, there were no snide comments from my brain and I felt...at peace. More peaceful than I had in weeks actually. Months, even.

"I think I need to go home and change." Bella said when she finally caught her breath.

"Let's go," I replied, with traces of mirth still in my voice.

&X&X&X&X&X&X&X&X&X&X&X&X

We were late for Biology. Bella had become Mr. Banner's star pupil winning the 'golden onion' each time we had a test or quiz. Recently the onion had morphed into the more budgeted 'magic tin'. Basically, he picked up a can that was reduced by 75% because the label had been peeled away. Apparently, the not knowing what it was the magic part.

"Hello class, we have another magic can up for grabs!" aforementioned class groaned, "Come on, you might win it!" More groaning. "Right. Well. I guess I'll save this for that _test_ tomorrow." Mr. Banner was such a child sometimes, if you didn't play what he wanted, he would have a temper tantrum and punish you.

"We'll do blood typing today instead. There's going to be a chance to donate blood in a few weeks, and it'll be good to learn what blood type everyone is. Who wants to go first?"

I paled at the word "blood". A whole class of people blood typing? My stomach churned and I wondered how I would ever get out of this one. Then I recalled Mr. Banner was looking for a volunteer. _ Please not me. Please not me. Please not me. Please not me. Please not me. Please not me. Please not me. Please not me._

"Mike Newton!"_ Ah, I should have known he'd pick the person who groaned the loudest. _

But that still didn't get me out of my fix. I would be called upon sooner of later.

"Catch me." Bella muttered under her breath. _What did that mean? _As the needle slid into Mike's skin and I saw the first sickening drops of red, Bella fell from her stool and hit the floor with a loud thud.

"Bella!" I crouched down on the floor with her as the rest of the class looked on.

"I said catch me you moron." she muttered, "I fainted and you have to take me to the nurse."

"I think she's fainted," I told Mr Banner who looked concerned, "She mentioned getting a little sick at the sight of blood...I'd better take her to the nurse."

"Yeah, go."

With his consent I scooped Bella up from the floor and felt her surprise at being lifted and smirked slightly. What did she think I was going to do? Drag her?

"Mike, get the door for Edward." Mike sullenly - and reluctantly - did as he was told.

I took Bella to the small courtyard where students would eat lunch if there was no rain and rested her on a picnic table. She looked so beautiful lying there with her eyes closed and white skin. Like a fairytale princess. _Snow White! _Red lips, skin as white as snow and dark hair. I let myself indulge in a fantasy of kissing her awake.

As this fantasy was playing out in my head, I had leaned nearer and nearer to Bella. And her blood red lips.

"Can I open my eyes yet?" Without waiting for a reply her dark eyes opened and stared into my green ones. Our lips were so close to touching I felt her cool breath on my lips, which only added to my desire.

"Edward." she breathed. Her voice was slightly lower than usual. _Did she want me to kiss her? How should I kiss her? If she even wanted me to? Did she? Should I just press my lips to hers anyway? A soft kiss? Harder?__**Did she even**_ want_**me to kiss her?!**_

Her eyes flickered to my lips before moving back to my eyes. _ SHE WANTS ME TO KISS HER! _My brain was practically throwing confetti.

"Hey, Cullen! You don't need to give her mouth to mouth!" And so the spell was broken by the ugly ogre.

"Mike." I almost growled, warning in my tone.

"Edward!" Bella said shocked and... delighted?

"Bella." I said in return playfully.

"Jessica!" Mike's patient said angrily, "Now we're all BFF's, can we please go to the nurse and get me a bucket before I puke on my new shoes!" Funny, she didn't sound nauseous at all. Just pissed.

"Sure, Jess. Let's go." Mike strode ahead towards the nurse's office, leaving Jessica about 3 feet behind him. Her glare only got worse as I lifted Bella back into my arms. Where she belonged.

"Edward, you don't need to hold me; I can walk."

"It's fine, I'll carry you Snow White."

"Snow White?" she smiled, "That's a new one Romeo. So, are you my Prince Charming?"

"You guys are disgusting. Get a _room _already." Jessica said, giving Bella a particularly ferocious glare before stomping off after Mike.

I carried on walking to the nurse's station and passed Jessica– Mike would probably tell if we didn't at least check in.

"Where are we going?" Bella asked as we turned into the nurse's office. She looked panicked as she saw the sign indicating what room we were going into.

Bella groaned and flopped her head over the side of my arm, so everything looked upside down to her.

"At least put me down and let me walk."

"Nope." I said cheerfully. I greeted the nurse who looked up from her book with shock as I burst in the door. Our pose almost mirrored the one on her book. The hero had the heroine in his arms as she stretched herself out. Both, of course, had minimal clothing.

"'His thrusting desire'" she read. "Ms. Lander, you shock me!" Bella chuckled. Was there_ any_ member of staff she didn't know personally?

"Ha ha Bella. Trip again?"

"Nope. But, as usual, I'm fine. Is it a good book?"

"Sweetheart, I wish you'd let me check you over sometime. You fall so much, you must be covered in bruises! And yes, it's a good book.."

"It's okay Maggie, I'm made of tough stuff!" she giggled. "Are you still folding the corner of the juicy pages?" she laughed.

'Maggie' laughed back and I went from prince to utterly redundant.

"You can put me down now, Edward."

"Bella," I said tentatively, "Can I talk to you a second please?"

"That'll be my cue to go." said Maggie, she was about to leave as she bumped into Mike and Jessica. "Who needs a nurse?"

When Jessica motioned to herself she said, "Mike, you go back to class and tell your teacher Jessica's with me."

"Okay, come on Cullen." Now I wanted to kill Mike and rip up the pieces.

"He's helping Bella. Back to class Mike. Jessica, you follow me." No wonder Bella loved Maggie so much, I was ready to marry her myself.

When we were finally left alone I began to speak.

"Thank you for that Bella. I don't know what I would've done if you weren't there. _Thank you._" I caught her eyes with the last sentence, so that she could see my sincerity. This created another intense moment between us though, like the one earlier except now there was no Newton to interrupt. I leant forward slightly, and Bella did the same so our lips were only a millimetre apart. We stood there for what felt like hours, but I enjoyed every second.

The smell of her breath, being so near to her, yet still not touching. It was torture, but it was amazing. I decided I would not let this chance escape me. I leant forward in a quick movement and pressed my lips to hers. Bella responded instantly, her hands went to my hair and she pushed me against the wall so my body was flush with hers, each contour of her body moulded to mine.

She was freezing. I had noticed earlier when I carried her, but it didn't register with my brain, or maybe my hormones just over rid all sense. (it was highly possible) Was she ill? Was that why she seemed so naïve? Because she didn't have an opportunity to go out because of treatment or surgery. So why was she out now? Was it terminal? The thought hurt my heart. Bella must've realised something was wrong because she pulled away as soon as my body tensed. She looked at my face, saw the anguish there and ran. Again.

I was left contemplating the fact that there could be a world without Bella. Who smiled so frequently and so beautifully, her who was amazing inside and out and who I l- liked....a lot._ And I just hurt her_, I thought, _I just caused her pain. _I didn't allow myself to think any more, I just mechanically went to my car and started to drive. The last thought that escaped me was,_ you are such a dick Edward. _

Z&Z&Z&Z&Z&Z&Z&Z&Z&Z&Z&Z&Z&Z&Z

**A/N **– Sorry if this was awful, it was pretty hard to write as I have no idea what it's like to be a **normal** teenage girl (highlight the 'normal') let alone a boy. Also, this is going to be completely smut-free, so I'm trying to keep it at it's rating and not make people think that's something that may be on the cards for the future.

And if you did want something like that – trust me, it would be awful. Bella would fall off the bed and ask if it's in yet (the answer would be no), Edward would be a nervous wreck and screw (←haha, I made a pun) everything up on his part and it would be, well, crap. And extremely not sexy.

That being said, hopefully you liked it.

-Melissa


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